d-UH? (The dis-Order of Urban Hermits?)
Founded by Greybeard the Pensive :), KSC, d-UH?, MM
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GREYBEARD |
Welcome to d-UH? !
This site was last revamped: 31st March, 2002 IC.
Greetings and welcome! to the dis-Order of Urban Hermits? of Greybeard the Pensive :), KSC, d-UH?, MM.This is a site dedicated to the goddess Eris, Holy Mother of Chaos, Confusion, Discord and Bird Crap on the Hood of Your Car.If you aren't familiar with Eris Discordia, trust me, She has been overly familiar with you. She has been screwing with your head for your entire life and has loved every minute of it. Just because you don't know about a Goddess and/or God (or don't believe in Them) doesn't mean that They can't take an active role in your life. (This is the advantage that Pantheists have over Fundamentalists; they know who to thank or to blame for their blessings and problems.) |
 Our
Flounder, age 21 |
To find out who Eris is and why She keeps losing your car keys all the time, I suggest that you rush right out and purchase a copy of Principia Discordia by Malaclypse the Younger to illuminate the darkness within which you dwell. (No, I don't get a cut of the profits! But I'm working on it . . . .) (Good luck finding it — it is in none of the better bookstores near you.) (The Principia is especially illuminating if you douse it with lighter fluid and light it with a match. Kids! Don't try this at home!) (Spiritual transcendence for only $9.95. Wotadeal! You don't even have to read it! Just slip it under your pillow, sleep on it for five nights and you will find Sartori. (This is similar to Satori but your clothes never have that weird bagginess drooping off your butt.) (And when you do find Sartori, remind him that he owes me fifty bucks.) )
Words of Wisdom from a non-Prophet:
For, behold, I sayeth unto thee, it is better to light a candle and knock it over while you're rooting around at the back of the bottom shelf of the refrigerator looking for that jar of Cheez-Whiz© during a power-black-out and burn down your neighborhood than to dwell in darkness.
Mrs. O'Leary's cow did — ask her.
Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble!
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Photo of Greybeard: ©Corbis
This page was created on the 3rd of Bureaucracy, 3167. It was last revamped — 6th of Discord, 3168.(Infidel translation: This page was created August 10, 2001. It was last revamped — March 20, 2002.)