The Litterbox Edition No. 43

Disclaimer: This newsletter contains explicit language and adult situations, and is sent to fifty-ish subscribers with great hair, fresh breath, and winning personalities.  The views expressed in this newsletter belong solely to the editor and the writers, who are all completely insane.  If you would like to stop receiving this newsletter, give it up for Lent.

Corduroy pillows are making headlines.

In this issue:
Cat's Official Arbitrary Length of Time
Topic 1) The Best Lil' Spring Break Ever
Topic 2) My Take on the War
Topic 3) Song Lyric of the Week
Topic 4) Webpage of the Week
Topic 5) Quote of the Week

Cat's Official Arbitrary Length of Time:
       Bad Joke/Pun Week(s).  I'll toss one in to get things rollin':
How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus?
At the circus, the clowns don't talk.

Topic 1) The Best Lil' Spring Break Ever:

By Me

       Screw the beach--too many drunk balcony-hanging lemmings anyway.  This year, I embarked on a journey properly entitled Alternative Spring Break.  I found myself in Podunk Town, North Carolina (also known as Asheboro), where the entire culture seems to revolve around eleven different churches (each with a flair for a specific type of cuisine, we found out).  Why did I end up in Asheboro, you ask?  Well, my dear, I was sent there with a team of twelve other wackos to do nothing other than . . . build a house.  Yes, indeed, Habitat for Humanity was calling our names, and our mission, which we chose to accept, was to start from the foundation and build upward as much as possible in the course of one week.  But, of course, we had obstacles to overcome.  Our main roadblock was our foreman, Gary, who was apparently made of salt and wouldn't let us build if there was a chance of rain.  So we laid Pergo in another house on those days.  Yes, that's Pergo, not Prego, kids.  It's a type of flooring as well as a pain in the butt at times.
       So there I was in Asheboro, bonding with a dozen other crazy collegians in addition to the townsfolk.  In our free time at nights, us young'ns played Sardines, Cranium, and two of us even did an 88-cent puzzle.  The different churches of the town fed us at each meal, so we basically got to meet their Senior Citizen organizations.  Except for that one church where we got to bond with the Soccer Moms.  (The boys liked that one the best.)
       To sum it up, Alt Spring Break is an awesome experience that many colleges offer and I suggest that everyone try it at least once.  You may just like it.  In fact, not all the trips are Habitats--I have friends who bonded with AIDS victims, abused women, little kids, and sea turtles.  Go ahead and find your niche, then explore it for a week while making lots of new friends.  Just don't count on getting any sleep (a tiny sacrifice for a larger-than-life experience, in my opinion).

Topic 2) My take on the War:

By Valerie Craft

There is a lot of talk about the war with Iraq right now.  Today up to 81 coalition troops have been killed, many of which died in accidents.  The father of one of the accident victims blamed President Bush for his son's death and called for an end to the war.  Of course I feel for the families of the dead troops, I can understand his pain, but I don't understand how he cannot support the war.
Thousands of Iraqis have died at Saddam Hussein?s hands.  Due to starvation or unsanitary conditions only one out of eight Iraqi children live to adulthood.  Entire villages have been killed as experimentation for chemical gases.  Iraqis are arrested or killed for speaking out against the government.
The world needs to stop the abuse being leveled at the Iraqis and take Hussein out of power.

Topic 3) Cat's Song Lyric of the Week:
       My girlfriend Penny, she's kinda skinny, and so she needs her falsies on
- "Good Time" by the Beach Boys (submitted by Lane)

Topic 4) Webpage of the Week:
      Will you be my friend? http://www.friendster.com/join.jsp?invite=70293
I will vouch for Friendster and say that it IS a cool site, and it kinda reminds me of that whole "6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon" thing.  So join it.  NOW.

Topic 5) Quote of the Week:
       "Of course, your roof might cave in, leaving a gaping hole through which many squirrels jump so they can gnaw through your carpeting, woodworking, and wiring.  That'll be the year your maintenance costs go up through the roof."
--from my Family Economics text

Closing:
      Ok, peace out kids.  Submissions still greatly appreciated (link to website at the TOP of this puppy).  And the second attachment is a picture of me and some of the kids from my Spring Break.