Going out to bars
lounges
nightclubs
wasn't something I liked to do.
I never got the point of it.
I didn't want to lose my inhibitions.
But every once in a while
the neighborhood gang
including me and Larry
went out for the night.
A new place had opened up in the city
called the Pussycat Lounge
and everybody but me was hot to go.
I dreaded it all day long
as I did my housewifely and motherly chores
and I put off getting into my dress
heels
hose
as long as I decently could.
But in the end
I went.
The music was loud.
Drinks were on the table.
The men were revving up
boasting
showing off
and the ladies were giggling.
But complete silence dropped over our table
when the first topless girl
Carmen
came out
wiggling
bouncing
dancing
exposed.
None of us had ever seen anything like this.
I couldn't believe it was allowed.
Our men were mesmerized
and all of us ladies went red in the face.
We couldn't look at Carmen.
I had a terrible thought.
What if the sky should split open
and Jesus should come
with a mighty trump of sound?
My heart leaped
and my breath came short
because I knew it would be just my luck
that He should come
and catch me here.
I pretended to have a coughing fit
and rushed outside
and gulped the clean cold air
deep into my lungs
and looked up at the black sky
dotted with stars
and knew I couldn't go back into the Pussycat Lounge.
On the way home
Mia teased me about being a prude
about being a preacher's daughter
and I laughed with her
but my soul was horrified.
Thirty years later
I sat with my grandson
at my computer
looking at paintball sites
and pop-up ads distracted us
offering hot bikini girls
and I was angry
that porn was so available
to my beloved boy.
I am still a prude
and a preacher's daughter.