This I Promise You Chapter 20
			Contemplating
	I wouldn’t have believed in all of the things that I’ve just heard if it didn’t come from Nicky Byrne’s mouth. Sure, I knew that he covered for Mark most of the time when it came to making excuses, but this was different. I knew Nicky wouldn’t lie about this one.       Still, it was way too incredulous to believe. You’d have to be dumb to believe it. But I figured that I’d probably fall for this one. Wasn’t I dumb enough to get married, even if I was totally against the idea? It’s not that I didn’t want to get married to Mark. I love him and even if he can be such a pain sometimes, I knew it would be hard to live without him. So that’s why I probably gave in when he asked me to marry him for the second time.       It was the whole concept of the marriage that I found cynical. Why get married if you know that sooner or later, the love fades away even if you don’t want it to? It fades because you get to see what the person is really like. And there are times that you can’t just stand what you see. Simple irritating things can turn into annoyance, then annoyance can turn into hatred. Then the search for someone else that you can get along with starts. In other words, the cheating starts. So as I’ve said, why get married if you know very well that this would happen? But, as I think of it, isn’t it a little too late to continue whining about this? I’m already married, and I have to live with it.       I looked at Nicky and Anya, and knew that they were dying to know what was going on inside my head. Come to think of it, with everything I said, I myself had no idea what I was thinking about. So, that brings me back to square one. Should I believe this story, or shouldn’t I?       Nicky told me everything that Mark had said and more. Apparently, it was true that they were doing an interview that was scheduled at the last minute, so Mark’s phone was turned off. He wanted to go home after the interview but the lads dragged him along for a drink. He wanted to call me but his phone went dead, and he asked to borrow the others’ phones, but they started teasing him about being “scared of the missus”, and more drinks came, and all the responsibilities were forgotten. And as for the perfume and lipstick on his collar, a crazed fan practically threw herself at Mark at the airport and started planting kisses on him. It was really hard to get her off, she had quite a grip. “Yeah right,” I thought. Five big men couldn’t pry off a single hormone driven teenager away from one of them.       So, after I’ve digested all that info, I once again faced the question of the day. Should I believe, or shouldn’t I?
				Chapter 21