Chapter 16

Elizabeth didn't know she ended up at the hospital. She didn't know Nikolas was sitting beside her in the waiting room. All she knew was the home movies that were playing over and over again in her head.

Her first meeting with Lucky. She was outside Kelly's smoking a cigarette. He walked up to her and told her;

"-Better be careful. You could stunt your growth.

-Is there a reason you care?

-Uh-uh.

-Oh. Well, that's too bad. What's your name?

-Lucky.

-We'll see."

Elizabeth smiled at the memory. She didn't see Nikolas looking at her, she didn't feel his hand on her arm, she didn't hear his voice say her name. Elizabeth was taken all the way back to when they first talked about Sarah

"-You have any brothers or sisters?

-None worth mentioning.

-I have one of those, too.

-I bet he's a brother.

-Now, how would you know that?

-Because if it was a sister, she'd have to be crazy about you."

Even then she knew how much he was special. Lucky had captured her heart right there, with his smile, with his voice, with his soul. He could always read her like an open book. He showed her when he asked about Sarah's musical taste;

"-But not you, right? No. You're the louder, the better.

-It's amazing how well you know me.

-You're kind of easy to read, you know? I mean, you wear whatever you're feeling like a shirt, just right out there for everybody to see. No, it's not a bad thing, really. It's not, I mean, and actually--actually saves a lot of grief when you know exactly where a person's coming from."

Elizabeth will never forget the first time she learned that Nikolas was actually Lucky's brother. He was still talking about Sarah, and Liz wanted to get back at him for it.

"-I do realize that you don't want to tell me what she's into for some reason, but could you at least just give me a hint on what she absolutely hates?

-You have got to get a life and stop obsessing about my sister. She's not returning the favor. You do realize she's on a date tonight.

-She had plans.

-Damn straight she did--with Nikolas Cassadine. Still want to know her favorite song?

-Anybody ever tell you you're a brat?

-My father. He thinks I was switched at birth with his real daughter. That's probably why he went to Bosnia.

-Maybe. Look, I'm sorry you're upset by what I told you. God, it must be eating you up inside that Sarah's got the hots for Nikolas Cassadine.

-And that gets you off.

-God, give it up, Lucky. The two of you are worse than Sarah and I, and we're related.

-Oh, that's cute.

-What is that supposed to mean?

-Don't play dumb, Elizabeth. It doesn't suit you. You know the relation between me and Nikolas.

-Excuse me, but--are you saying that the two of you are brothers?"

For long he didn't believe her when she said she didn't know. For long he didn't believe a lot of things. All that changed since the rape. He became her rock, her angel. And now he was gone, because of her. If only she had given him the kiss he wanted, when he wanted it.

Elizabeth remembered the night of the Bacchanalia, when they danced.

"-I just can't figure out where all these people learned how to waltz.

-You call that waltzing? Robin's lucky Nikolas hasn't stomped her to death.

-Oh, and I suppose you can do better?

-You want to see? Come on."

He was so proud, so eager to show he was better than Nikolas. Always in competition with his older brother. But, with her, he was always ready to take the blame. Like when she first asked to kiss her, and she backed out, he blamed himself;

"-Elizabeth, hang on a second! Listen, there's no reason to be scared, ok? I'm not going to touch you. I'm sorry. Look, I should have known not to try kissing you. I'm sorry.

-You did it because I asked you to. God, what is wrong with me?

-Nothing!

-I just want to be well, I just want to be normal!

-We already discussed that. We're never going to be normal. That's what makes us superior. No matter what you said, I just--I shouldn't have tried that.

-No, you never would have if I hadn't made you. Just don't sweat it.

-You know that, do you? Look, I probably shouldn't say this--but I have wanted to kiss you a hundred times.

-You have?

-Yeah, for months."

Elizabeth's heart was about to leap out of her chest at that very moment. When he did kiss her though, it was magical. Elizabeth smiled at the memory of the face he made, when she gave him his guitar. He talked about his dad for a while, and then he said something she will never forget;

"- I don't want you to go, but I don't want you to get in trouble, either.

-I hope you don't freeze tonight.

-You know, everything about you is the best--the best there is."

Helping her getting down of the boxcar she fell in his arms, and he kissed her. He finally kissed her. That was the most magical night of her life up to that point. He nearly kissed her again a couple of days later, when they were out on the lawn, watching the stars. She said that Nikolas was handsome and he was jealous. Not that he would've admitted it or anything, but still;

"-Nikolas, handsome? Give me a break. You're attracted to wax figures.

-I'm attracted to people more like you.

-Well, feel free to expand.

-Ok. That light in your eye? You know, that sort of twinkle? You don't see that a lot. And the way your eyes change colors, the way you look at me.

-I'll let you in on a secret. My eyes don't twinkle when you're not around.

-Oh, yes, they do.

-No.

-Lucky, I've watched you. Watching you was my all-consuming hobby. Oh. So much for subtlety.

-Subtlety's--subtlety's fine, you know, as far as it goes. You see, it only goes so far. Subtlety is ‘that sweater looks pretty,' when what you really mean is "I love your mouth."

-Are we speaking hypothetically?

-Uh-uh. I'm talking about this one right there."

Too bad Gram got home when she did, or it would've been their second kiss. He asked her to be his girl at thanksgiving of that very year, and told her he loved her at Christmas. He was so nervous, she just wanted to take him in her arms;

"-I know we agreed not to see other people a while back, but I just wanted to make it official. I mean, I -- I wanted you to have something you could wear that says -- well, tells you that we belong together. Something you can look at any time, day or night, and be reminded of how much you've changed my life and how much I love you.

-You just said you love me

-I know. You don't have to say it back. I mean, you don't even have to love me back. I mean, you can consider this just an ordinary best friend's ring. I just thought you ought to know.

-Lucky, I thought you already knew. I am in love with you. I have been all along."

The look he gave her at that very moment, was the one she wanted to remember the most. It was full of love, full of hopes. They talked about the future the next month. He wanted her to go to New York in an Art school, and, even today, she still remembered the promises they said to each other.

"-See, I had a lot of time to think while I was in Canada. And most of it was about us and just about how much fun we have together. I mean, how comfortable we are with each other, how you make me feel. And I -- I don't see that changing, Elizabeth. I don't. And I don't see myself finding it with anyone else. So all these dreams about the future, all these moments that we want to share, for me, they're real. I'm promising you now, on my life, no matter what, I'll be with you forever. Do you feel the same way?"

She didn't answer him at first, so he continued speaking his mind;

"-See, once my family settled in Port Charles and we didn't have to run or look over our shoulders, I stopped thinking about the future except as something that would show up someday. I mean, I knew -- I knew I'd eventually hit college, then the real world, but it was all too far away for me to wrap my head around. You know, it just -- it felt good to just chill. And when my future did cross my mind, it was always in some vague sort of way. I mean, I didn't know who would be in it, who I'd want to share it with. And then you happened. You just went and changed everything, didn't even ask for my permission. And now all I think about is the future -- that's it -- with you right by my side, smiling that incredible smile. I want to be able to count on that. I know we're young, and believe me, I know that stuff happens that you don't except, but what I know even more is that there'll never be another girl for me no matter what. You're who I want to be with, ok? Can you say the same thing? Wait, wait, wait. I want more. Can you -- can you say the same and promise it forever?

-Lucky, before I met you, I never felt as if I belonged anywhere. I was the exact opposite of you. I did think about my future. It was my only way out – a place I could run to and forget about the lame today I'm stuck in. And, you know, the funny thing is that before last year, you were the one who was kicking back and living in the moment and just loving it, while I was focusing everything on escaping it. And now today, you're the one who's thinking about what's coming up ahead. And I, for the first time in my life, am so here because I don't want to miss anything. I don't want to take anything for granted. And, you know, the wild thing's that we balance each other out like that. Somehow we cover both ends of the spectrum. I don't know if this is making any sense.

-No, I know what you mean. I think it's called symbiotic, like we complete each other.

-That's exactly it. You finish me. I can't imagine my life without you in it. I don't know who I'd be without the other half of me that's you. So I guess what I'm trying to say is, yes, I feel the same way. And I'm giving you my promise to be with you forever. And the day after that, if it's possible. "

Forever wasn't long enough. It was too short. He wasn't supposed to go! She still loved him! They still had dreams to fill! The last time he wanted to kiss her she refused, and now, she would never get to kiss him again! The last time she kissed him, he didn't even feel it! Elizabeth took her hand to her mouth, wanting to feel the pressure of Lucky's lips on hers. Something sticky was on her hand and she got up, looking at herself in the closest mirror and she saw what it was. Lucky's blood. He was dead. DEAD!

The reality hit her like a ton of bricks, and she started trashing everything around her, screaming her pain, while she heard in the background.

"-Mrs. Hardy, Bobbie, she is out of shock! HURRY"