Sure, she gave herself to him all night, but it was a way of saying good-bye to him. She just wanted to feel his touch one last time. She wasn't doubting his love for her, but, like all men, his body was stronger than his mind. She would always love him, and never another man would touch her. She was sure of that. And she thought that Lucky felt the same way about her, never to touch another woman, but she was wrong.
Liz got dressed after her shower. Lucky was still sleeping peacefully. That was a good thing, because he would've tried and stop her, and Liz knew he would've succeeded. She didn't eat breakfast, her heart was still to much upside down to be able to swallow anything. Crying silently, Elizabeth leaned down and kissed him one last time. She saw him frowned and she left.
She walked all the way to City Hall, with her winter coat tightly around her body. The wind was blowing and the temperature was as cold as her heart.
The clerk at the desk took her to the right person, to whom she told her case.
"-I feel a little embarrassed to be telling you this but here it goes. I was raped a while ago. I thought I was over it so I got married last September. But I realized that I am not over it, and I can't give myself to my husband. That is why I would like our marriage to be invalidated.
-How long ago were you married Mrs. Speencer?
-September 15, of this year.
-Well, I would love to help you out, I really would, but it's too late now to get it invalidated. You now need to get a divorce.
-But I thought that, as long as the marrriage wasn't, you know, you could get it invalidated
-Well if that was true, everybody wouldd come here at one point and say this, not to get a divorce. You have to get it invalidated within two weeks, if not, the states take it that you are married. I'm sorry about what happened to you, I really am, but I can't do anything about it."
Elizabeth was crushed. She knew she would never have the guts to file for divorce. Walking back to the apartment, she was thinking of every little opportunities she had. The only thing she could do, is get another apartment and declared that they were separated.
Lucky was up when she got home. He smiled at her, and got up to kiss her. Liz turned her head around and he got the message loud and clear. She was still mad at him. But he didn't do nothing wrong. He helped a friend in time of need, was that so bad? Then he remembered something she said. Marysa told her that he was at her house last night. Why the hell did she say something like that? Lucky never thought she had a crush on him, just like he never thought she wanted to break him and Elizabeth up.
"-Peaches? He said gently
-My name is Elizabeth. She answered
> -Ok then, Elizabeth? If I try to talk to you about what happened last night will you listen or you'll trash the room again?
-You can talk, doesn't mean I'll listenn. She just answered
-I'll take my chances. He knew how mucch she was curious. I don't know why Marysa said something like that to you last night. I wasn't with her. You can call Greg and ask him, he'll tell you I kept him from drinking his head off.
-He'll say whatever you told him to. DDon't think I'm stupid enough to fall for the old "call my drinking buddy" trick.
-God Elizabeth, it isn't a trick! Calll Melissa, she'll tell you she dumped him! And now you are dumping me! Is this a way for you to get me out of your life without feeling guilty?
-How dare you pin this thing on me? I was faithful to you. I'm not the one flirting around
-Neither am I! I don't flirt with no oone. You know me well enough to know that I am not like that! I love you to much. Even if I didn't, you know I'm too shy to try anything. How many times did you say that?"
Elizabeth knew he had a point there. And she also knew that Marysa would say anything to cause trouble. But it was too much coincidence. Him not being here, calling only five minutes after she had called Marysa?
"-Elizabeth, you are my life. I would never risk losing you. When we were separated, I thought I would die. I can't breath when you are not near me. How can you think I would go and jeopardize that? I am crazy about you and I know you are crazy about me. Please, don't throw our love away just because some bimbo is playing with your head.
-Lucky just leave me alone Okay? I donn't want to talk about it anymore. I have to get to class!"
She took her bag and head on out the door, leaving Lucky in the middle of the kitchen, with tears running down his face.
Lucky started cleaning up the mess she did last night. In their rush, they didn't pick anything up. The frame with their wedding picture was broken, just like his heart. Lucky, with the picture in his hand, sat on the bed and started crying.
Elizabeth could not hear a word the teacher was saying. The only thing she had in her mind was Lucky. She wanted to believe. So bad. She needed him in her life. He was the only one who could make her smile, the only one who was worth for her to continue breathing.
During the break, Liz came face to face with Marysa. She had a big smile on her bitchy face. Elizabeth, without saying anything, passed next to her and continue her way. She was going home. She didn't want to stay in her class, knowing she couldn't concentrate. Lucky was not there. Liz didn't know if she was happy about it. Sure she didn't want to see him, but she still needed to see his face. Her heart was aching, worst than she could ever imagine. This was too much for her to bear. Losing Audrey, and then Lucky? Her poor heart was about to give up on her.
Liz was ready to go to her next class. She didn't feel like it, but staying home without Lucky was not a really good idea either. She didn't know where he was, didn't leave a note or a message on the machine.
Arriving at school, Elizabeth realized it wasn't a good idea either. This was her Sociology class, with Lucky and Marysa. When Liz arrived at the room, Lucky was already there. He didn't see her, he was concentrating on something he was writing. Marysa arrived at that moment and went straight for Lucky's desk. Elizabeth got closer, but she tried to stay out of sight. Audrey thought her more than eavesdropping, but she had to know what the conversation was about.
"-Marysa, why don't you leave me the hell alone? Lucky was saying
-I hope I didn't cause too much troublee last night with the little Mrs.
-No why? Elizabeth knows better than tto listen to your stupid lies.
-That's why she hung up on me? Where wwere you for her to look all the way to my house?
-I honestly don't think that this is noone of your business. I wasn't where I should've been, home with my wife
-Well, next time you don't feel like gooing home, stop at my house. Then if she calls, it won't be a lie
-Marysa, I'm counting to three. If youu are still there when I'm finished, you will see how much it hurts to be punched by a man
-You are in a bad mood
-One
-Ok I'm going but if...
-Two
-I'm gone"
Elizabeth was stunned. Lucky was with Greg last night. Marysa just admit it was all a great big lie. She left by the door at the end of the class, and got in again from the door next to the teacher's desk. Lucky looked up at the same moment and saw her. His heart just missed a beat. Elizabeth went and sat next to him, so that Marysa would believe him when he said Liz didn't believe her. Lucky looked at her intensively and went back to his paper. Liz saw that this was the report he was supposed to do last night. His pen was scratching the sheets really fast. The teacher came in the room and started the class.
Lucky was always looking at Elizabeth. She was so beautiful he thought he would die. She was listening to the teacher and taking notes, a flock of her hair was in her face. Lucky was at war with himself not to reach out and put it behind her ear.
"-I want to know who can explain to me the meaning of what I just read? Said the teacher. Anyone? How about you Ms. Spencer?"
At her name Elizabeth looked at the teacher. Pointing him with her pen, she started explaining how she understood the problem. Lucky was watching her answer every single one questions the teacher threw at her and smiled. She was smart. Really smart.
.-That's good Ms. Spencer, thank you. Now, on to the next thing"
Elizabeth looked at Lucky, saw he was looking at her with pride in his eyes and smiled. She was proud of herself too. She knew Mr. Loomis and if he questioned her was because he thought she wasn't following. She sure showed him!
"-Ok class, that's all for today. Ms. Spencer, I'd like to see you a moment please."
Elizabeth was mad. She didn't want to stay. She had to talk to Lucky, but even before she got up from her chair, Lucky was already gone. Mr. Loomis told her how much he was proud of her progress in class, and he asked her if she would accept working for him part time, grading papers.
"-I know you are a married woman, he said, but you are my best student, and with the finals coming up, I need someone who accept to help me with them. He said
-I would love to Mr. Loomis. Just telll me when. But I have to warn you, I'm going home for the holidays.
-That is not a problem. I'll give you the papers, you can take them home with you, and when you are done with them, send the whole thing by courier. "
She got home slowly, not really in a rush. She knew she would find it empty. She put her key in the door, and got in. She jumped when she saw Lucky, in the middle of the kitchen, with his guitar in his hand.
"-Lucky, you scared me half to death, she said with a little smile"
Lucky didn't say anything but he started playing his guitar. She knew the song, it was one of her favorites.
"If I could right the wrongs that made you cry
I make a promise not to say good-night
'Cause I'm holding on
With a love so strong
And I can't take a day without you by my side
Girl if I could change
If I could change your mind
Baby you could help me wipe these tears from my eyes
Girl don't stop
The sun from shining down on me
'Cause I can't face another day without your smile
And if you take away the loving arms the suit around me
Then I may break down and cry just like a child
Girl, I can't belong and I won't be free
I I fail to bring your lovin' back to me
So I'm pressin' on
I hope you understand
There's a broken heart that lies inside you hands
So if I could change
And it won't hurt your pride
Baby you can help me stop those tears that I cry
Girl don't stop
The sun from shining down on me
'Cause I can't face another day without your smile
And if you take away the loving arms the suit around me
Then I may break down and cry just like a child
Elizabeth took her hands to her face, while lucky was looking at her, anxious to see what would be her next move. She got closer and stopped in front of him. She looked at him with a little smile and said;
"-Hey big Spencer, think you could take that guitar out of my way so I can kiss you?"
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