|
||||||
| Home |
Upset
in Towel Fighting
Chad answers without hesitation, "Well my chances to win are good but I don't know if I can take the life in prison after I kill Justin and urinate on his carcass. We decided that it would be a good time to switch our interview over to Justin who seemed to be less psychotic. We asked Justin the same question. "What do you think your chances are to beat this brute who has 20 lbs on you?" Justin
responds with a series of grunts and odd noises which could not be
understood, It
was hard to get through the formalities as these to brutes were eager for
the taste of blood. Eventually the match began as any match would, with the
traditional handgrip. Off the start the quicker Justin had the upper hand as
long as he stayed on his feet switching from windmill to jackhammer and
seemed to keep Chad guessing. Things took a turn while the veteran, Justin,
decides to make a rookie move and try the Jacki Chan too early in the match
with Chad having way too good of a grip on the towel. Chad uses his weight
to push Justin down and tries a series of holds and body wrenching moves
that would make any contortionist squirm. As you can see in the picture on the left, Justin is working up a new move now called the twist. The move is executed by wrapping the hand of your opponent with the towel and tightening it around his hand. With one quick jerk, you will easily be able to rip the towel from that hand, making this a possible final move if your opponent is caught with one hand on the towel. This
was the turning point of the match. It gave Justin, who has more endurance,
a chance to get Chad with one hand on the towel on his feet to work the jack
hammer and windmill some more. Chad must have been a little cocky, during
the match he found the time during the flurry of phalangeal fighting
flowing flight of flying floating fury, to say, "Now I am just along
for the ride." Obviously taunting Justin by saying that this fight was
more like a roller coaster which is actually fun While on the ground he works himself into the perfect position for an alligator roll, the move feared by all towel players. Alas, Justin masterfully combines the alligator roll, to loosen Chad's grip, and then the jack hammer once he was on his feet to take the towel and triumph. After
the match Chad was asked, "How do you feel about losing this
match?" He responded, "I didn't care if I won or not, I went in there trying to hurt him. See he is bleeding! I made him bleed! I win!" In reality all Chad did was reopen previous rug burns created from long towel fights with his arch nemesis Tim Yandow.
(Editor's Note: This is Chad's first and last match. The humiliation he faced has caused him to turn girly and claim that he didn't try and doesn't like the game. Blasphemy.) |
|||||
The
match began as any match would, with the traditional handgrip. The 180 lb
Chad Winchell had 20 lbs and the bets of many in his favor on the 160 lb
Justin Knowles. When asked before the match "What do you think
your chances are against the much quicker Justin?" 
but
through the blather the words "I kill fat Chad good." Neither
competitors seemed to be very responsive in their towel induced rage so we
decided to get on with the match.
and
doesn't take any effort on his part. Justin wasn't going to take this and
his frenzy increased. Chad made a last ditch effort to put Justin into some
sort of hold and ran him into the ground like a tent stake. He moved too
quick while Justin still had a lot of energy left. This turned out to be
Chad's undoing. He might have had a chance holding on and waiting until
Justin was tired and strike when he didn't expect it.