| 22:14:14) ®(§ÞÎLL) ÂGÊ!! says to Lodger: Maple syrup? Not with those crisps! Master Howard, on the other hand, felt delighted to chance his luck on the pool table with a daring young filly called "Arnold". They both WHicker baskets weaved by blind cheese cloth machines all for £300 or nothing! Must dash! Ends soon! Floods and draughts with Mr Spacebleed and the real Space Osmonds interfering with Our sheds are discount and superbly made! Aol online and BTech diploma in Foreskin Vera! Vera! Vera! Mend them gutters for t poor chinkie birds! 22:08:05 §) Lodger PRIVATELY whispers to ®(§ÞÎLL) ÂGÊ!!: Cecil the pensioner was caught drinking from the toilet, , , , his mum was decaying in the coal shed, so she couldnt really tell him off or turn in her grave, meanwhile.....Land of Leather, last ever rip u off, wank in yer face, closing down, running off, bankruptcy sale, bring yer kids, bore em to fuck, leave empty handed sale,cats birthday sale, free for all, free for me........freeedom of peace, goodwill to hedgehogs, balls to the law, im hillary 76(UK), feel free to message me at weekends.......btw Blanche smears her lips with fred elliots babber.....bye for now :0) (22:03:50) ®(§ÞÎLL) ÂGÊ!! says to Lodger: I once woke up with my underpants the wrong way round. *Dunno why my underpants were waking up with me though, I didn't see as I was the wrong way ro......etc.... dlfkdhusfl sdufgh douifh s 21:42:27) Lodger says to Zen!: paddy goes for a job on a building site, fore man asks Paddy can ya brew up......*AYE*......paddy can ya drive a jcb?........*Fcuk me, how bigs yer kettle*.............nklbdnkbnkbnn knlbnt bklnblrb ' 22:19:03) Lodger says to ®(§ÞÎLL) ÂGÊ!!: Harrys pet shop, knackerd parrots and bunnies eyes, fish with flabby thighs,,,,,,,Debts mounting up?.....No problem, transfer your one wank to one simple monthly payment, do a runner, do the fandango, thunderbolts and overdrafts very very frightening me.....Overdose Overdose,,,,,,,the bailiffs at the door........NER NER DUR DUR DUR ......Mamma just let the bailiff in,,,,,,,pulled a final demand from under the bed,,,,,,,blew the roof right off his garden shed.......GOODBYE everybody..........going down b&Q to buy one.....hEY FUCK, our prices are great :0)......buy shit you dont need really cheap, take this Dessert storm orbital sander(endorsed by andy mcnabb).....£2654748, Hiroshima heat gun £27747858, dangerous bastard planer for FREE, yesh fuck all........you can seriously hurt yerself ........but hey lets have fun doing it (22:28:30) Lodger says to ®(§ÞÎLL) ÂGÊ!!: In trouble, need a hand , Town taken over by bullies?.......If you can find them, maybe you can hire the A TEAM........if the cunts get another series.....(Crazy fool) (22:35:24) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: I simply couldn't contain my excitement that crispy winter's morning as I arose to the sounds of bells. Yes, the very bells which once chimed out dear grand papa's dying rhasps were finally ringing out my washing. What pleasant surprises would behold my tired eyes that chilly frosty morn'? I descended the stairwell and nervously opened the lounge door. A cry of glee met my ears as I entered. For it was none other than Vera Duckworth , masturbating across the hearth with Mike Tyson eating bananas and singing "Old man river" 22:48:00) Lodger says to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: HOMEBASE, Lesley look at these fairy lights , fuck off neil its june........can we have a decking?...No,.......NO garden?.......Nooooo Problem, Demolish your house and modify your partners face with our range of shite power toolz and *How To* leaflets, thats right fuck yer house right up/right down to the ground and build a decking wooden thingy and be the envy of your neighbours......not sure on what look to give your Mrs?......see instore for details.........E Sure car insurance for old people and Cripples......*You will expire before yer cover does* (22:53:49) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! says to Lodger: My cat developed a liking for elderly men! I took it to the vet but the vet was 17.5%. SO I had to take it to the water board service charge display options! Noone understood my predicement! *AN enclosed paved area in an urban development*23:01:36 §) Lodger PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: Curtains Galore, unfold em, hang em up, wipe yer cock on em, fight em, take em to the pub, show em off to yer mates........pluck the spiders legz from a fat girls arse, doo whatcha like.......POST OFFICE.....pensions cartax, giros n shit.....we sell drugz too......need 5 more benefit books?...Noooo problem,,,open an *Its not really me*.....takes forever handwritten stoneage account.....fuck veras arse on tuesdays and thursdays......and.....SMASHHERSAGGYARSETHRUTHEFUCKINGWALL 22:40:36) ®(§ÞÎLL) ÂGÊ! says to Lodger: Mr Kipling walked a fine summer's morn', to find Jack and Vera sommersaulting in the apple trees. "Get the fuck out yer cunts!!" He shouted angrily. Curly dropped down from a nearby wall and shouted "Scarper lads!" They did, but not before shooting Mr Kipling in the mouth. Pampers originals, they taste like spring in your washing! 2:22:54 §) Lodger PRIVATELY whispers to ®(§ÞÎLL) ÂGÊ!!: Sheila Grant makes a move on Jimmy Corkhill, he goes beserk and trashes the cabin...rita is furious, mavis complains about biscuits........DFS last ever bankholiday, xmas , easter, the popes birthday, my cisaerean, your garden, buy one now get a camel and big top free, yesh for fuck all.........Samantha transexual 25496143684 available for weekend fun....your curtains or mine?.......this record is not available in the shops.....well that wraps it for this episode, time has caught us up once again, nearly forgot, Gayle tyldsley shaves Norris's balls and KICKSEMUPHISFUCKINGARSE 22:43:21 §) Lodger PRIVATELY whispers to ®(§ÞÎLL) ÂGÊ!!: : £week old pie waits menacingly in the oven, the kettle wanks into the toaster, curtains sway seductively.......Dorothy chokes on cock, Cat Deeley introduces cd uk. darius is squelched and sent thru the turd chopper.........Whoooooaaaa BODYFORM, shaped for big cunts, shaped for flange shaped for You OoOoooOOOoooOooOOoooOoOoooOOOooOOOOoooo.. (22:35:40) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: Slits small threads of pastry in the "Crattile" fashion. (22:36:04) Lodge says to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: you making one of them ponce fencing masks? 22:37:02) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!says to Lodge: No, simply attaching cahes to menstruating cattle in the hopes of hybreeding two identical carrots and forming a latticework od needle pointed carotine based products! (22:38:11) Lodge says to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: i cant work...the cows will explode as the intensity of milk escalates...thus rendering the carrotts soggy and emotionaly unstable 22:38:32) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! says to Lodge: But it's worth a try! 22:40:01) Lodge says to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: try parsnips at 24degrees.....and cultivate in a southernly direcction taking care not to stick yer head out the helicopter window when washing the massey fergusson 22:40:55) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! says to Lodge: I did that, but experienced some thermal upbringing and henceforth sounded light headed with wind chaffing up mi cunt! 22:42:34) Lodge says to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: Hmm venting pent up aggression from the perpendicular regions is a recipe for terminal parsnip ornothology....i suggest 3 tablespoons of benylin and hoovering twice a day (22:43:19) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! says to Lodge: That would work using only a spoon and a hairdryer of sorts *Actually a thimble full of meths* 22:43:33) Lodge says to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: mine or yours? (22:43:46) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! says to Lodge: THora Hurds I imagine. (22:44:14) Lodge says to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: lest go round...try on her wooly tights and bum her dead :) (22:44:37) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! says to Lodge: Bum her dead alright! She's a few months cold and that's sexual!!! (22:48:11 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: pmsl...can u imagine bumming thora hurd in her front room whilst that shirley bassey bond theme *nobody does it better shite blares out....... (23:11:19 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: theres a plantpot on top of me car...!!!!!!!!! (23:11:38 §) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!PRIVATELY whispers to Lodge: Why?23:12:01 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: and theres a frigging plant in it...!!!!! (23:12:12 §) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! PRIVATELY whispers to Lodge: Is it a nice one? (23:12:21 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: how the fuck should i know..its just..THERE# (23:12:46 §) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! PRIVATELY whispers to Lodge: But is it a succulant or a small clipped houseplant?(23:13:20 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: ffs...look...wot u want me do?....go out there have a chat with it and offer it a fucking biscuit? (23:13:21 §) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! PRIVATELY whispers to Lodge: If it looks nice, then you may be wise as to leave it there. *For show* (23:13:45 §) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! PRIVATELY whispers to Lodge: It could also make the car look faster. (23:13:47 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: naw...no fucker rides for free (23:14:20 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: perhaps it may sway traffic wardens into forgetting about booking me (23:14:46 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: bet its some fucker arsing around (23:16:56 §) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! PRIVATELY whispers to Lodge: I KNOW WHAT IT'S THERE FOR!!! (23:17:32 §) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!! PRIVATELY whispers to Lodge: It's from Thora Hurd's ghost, to say thanks!!! (00:07:35) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: "My my" Said Mr Kipling. In one of his better thoughts, perhaps moved by the motion of the grass, gently brushing past the small stone cobbles, he pondered greatly, the vast meaninful entity that sat in his garden with a fork on it's knacker. "I should certainly name my cherry bakewells after that." Later that year, he produced his famous *Cherry Bakewell Bastard thing fork arse head pies* They sold out that February. (21:23:03) Lodge says to Man*SPILLAGE*: kerplunk for pensioners.......withdraw pipecleaners from the colostomy bag...feel the tension and stench mounting....bet your rival to the grave ..... a stedy hand is required to stop the false gnashers from falling on the carpet and turning fuzzy with cathair (21:26:16 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to Man: OldFuckeroo..!!!!!!!....how many vans of economy catfood can u hang on the shopping trolley before they get ejaculated off and break your bifocals?.....NHS players should exercise extreme caution (22:00:27) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!<> says to Lodge: loL !I always try to fuck three goats per day. If not, I tend to drive a Harley into a wall for fun as I despise fat things. (22:07:24) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!<> stares at everyone in amazement and says: My last boyfriend died of eye love when he inadvertently sucked a grape with his knee on the motorway! How we laughed at his gran when we "did her!" (22:08:47 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: sara lee smeared in jam, george formby in bed with his gran*VOGUE*...Forbi + Fireguard dressed like the queen......on the cover of a magazine*VOGUE*....... 22:14:05 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: hairy coconuts armed with immac...3 steps upwards one back....savage underpants killer mice.....im on the run cos i fucked a george foreman twice...!!!!!1 22:20:43) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!<> says to Lodge: I phoned the filth on a bloke trying to break a window of a neighbour's house this evening. They came ten minutes later and then left! Why do they orgasm after a call? The man left empty handed as they missed him and hit the walls. (22:33:31 §) Lodge PRIVATELY whispers to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: im here and not...maybe someday we can make willies nad lamshades (22:31:54) ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!<>: Goodbye everyone *especially Lodger who I share dresses with and jam* I love some people and I despise none but sometimes not talk to others as I have a special net for arse cribbage sessions. Take care and be Ernest. (22:32:18) BRITS SUCK COCK says to ®§ÞÎLLÂGÊ!!: cocksucker...... |
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| Sometimes, when you're in a chatroom, things can get quite arsed and shite. So, Lodger (A.K.A "Scooby") and I, tend to while away the time with some abstract bollocks. Here are just a few examples, sdlfijnh djksopidj sdnmklskd !! |
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