Return to Challenges etc. Index
“Now this,” John said, his voice full of wonder, “looks almost exactly like the mall in Houston where my dad took me shopping for my 8th birthday present.”
Aeryn looked around them. The enclosed commerce center was constructed of metal, stone and glass, as far as she could tell, and it had two levels. There were individual stores on either side of a long, open area filled with beings of many races. Like Earth? “I hardly think that’s likely,” she told him dryly.
John tore his eyes away from the wonders in front of him and looked at Aeryn. He saw a slight twinkle in her eye. That was good. He liked to see her happy. It had been a rare enough state in the first monens after her return from Talyn without his twin, and even now, it didn’t happen often. “No, really,” he told her. “Minus the critters and aliens, of course. It was big and open, and it had a skylight just like that one.” He pointed to the ceiling.
“I thought the sky on Earth was blue, not green,” she said.
John shrugged. “Close enough.” He took a deep breath then, and observed, “Of course, the food court smelled a lot different.”
Aeryn actually laughed at him. “I can imagine it must have,” she said, wrinkling her nose.
John could see her eyeing him with what he would swear was speculation. Now what was that about?
They’d been friends once, before the pain and betrayal and loss, and the now-completed campaign against Scorpius had reminded them of how well they worked together. In the time since then, they’d found their way to a level of comfort with each other’s presence. But neither one of them dared imagine anything more. The fates were clearly against them. Best just to remain comrades.
“Show me what reminds you of Earth,” she said finally.
John blinked. “O-kay,” he said, looking around. The place wasn’t really *that* earthlike if he were honest with himself. But, he’d started it, so…. “That,” he said, pointing at the moving stairway to the lower level. “On Earth, that’s called an escalator.” And indeed, it didn’t look so different from ones on Earth. After all, the principle was the same.
The word had apparently translated okay, because she nodded as if filing it away. “How does it work?” she asked.
He started to explain the principles, and she interrupted, “No, how do you *use* it?”
“Oh. You just step on the top step, and hold the handrail. The escalator does all the work.”
Aeryn nodded. “I’m hungry,” she announced. “Let’s take your escalator to the lower level where they’re selling food. What did you call it? Food yard?”
She was in an odd mood, asking about Earth. He really didn’t understand it. Her time with his twin had changed her, even as his time alone had changed him. She surprised him now, in ways she never had before.
“Food court,” he said, going along with her request. “Okay. You want to eat, we’ll eat.”
They headed for the top of the escalator. There were several people ahead of them. John pointed to the pair of aliens heading for the steps. “See? Just step onto the top step, and use the rail for balance.”
“Seems simple enough,” Aeryn said, watching as the couple stepped onto the moving stairway. The male seemed to loose his balance slightly, and swung around awkwardly until he grabbed the railing to steady himself. Aeryn turned around and looked at John, then tossed her head and said, “Come on.”
Wordlessly, unsure of what was going on in her head, John followed.
Aeryn stepped fearlessly onto the escalator. With his longer legs, John managed to step onto the same riser, even though he was following her. When she swayed slightly, disoriented by the movement, he reached out a hand to steady her, as he would have Chiana, or D’Argo or even Rygel. He expected her to straighten up, take the railing. Instead, she seemed to move imperceptibly closer to him. Just when he’d convinced himself he was imagining it, she leaned her head lightly on his shoulder until they reached the bottom and stepped off.
What the frell? Just go with it John, he thought. Think of it as a trip to the mall with one of your sisters. The girls used to get “mushy” with their big brother sometimes…. She wanted to know what reminded him of home? Fine, they could window shop on their way to the food area. He scanned the display windows on either side of the mall.
“Hey,” he said suddenly, taking in a window full of small animals. “A pet shop!” He abruptly headed towards it, and Aeryn had no choice but to follow.
“Don’t tell me you had one of *those,*” she said, pointing towards something with three heads that looked like a cross between a hedgehog and a small giraffe.
“No,” he admitted, looking at the rest of the animals in the window. None of them looked in the slightest like anything he’d ever seen or heard of on Earth. “But they’re all cute and fuzzy,” he said, “just like baby animals everywhere.”
He realized unexpectedly why his subconscious had brought him to that window. He looked again at the animals behind the glass and said, without looking at Aeryn, “That’s what my dad got me at the mall for my 8th birthday. A dog. I named him ‘Rufus.’” Funny. He could say that with a smile, even if it was a small one, without thinking that he had no idea how far away the nearest dog of any sort actually *was.*
“Did you love him?” Aeryn asked curiously.
“Well, sure. You know. A boy and his dog. We were inseparable.” John smiled.
She looked at him oddly again, a hint of sadness in her eyes. “Come on,” she said abruptly, tossing her head in the direction of the food court and starting to walk.
John followed.
He could smell the food now, and he thought from time to time there *was* a hint of something familiar in the mix of odors wafting through the center.
“Find me something that tastes like Earth,” she said when they got to the bustling stalls.
This Earth game was really making him nervous, but by now, he was interested in finding whatever it was that smelled familiar, just to solve the mystery. “Okay, come on,” he said, leading her from stall to stall.
He used his sense of smell rather than sight….if it smelled right, it would be more likely to *taste* right, he’d learned that much in the cycles he’d been in the Uncharted Territories. Aeryn followed him quietly, watching him, and smiling softly in a way that completely unnerved him.
“A-ha!” he announced at last, stopping in front of a stall that served some kind of mix of chopped vegetables and meat with a sauce and something that looked like a grain. The seasonings smelled like fried rice, or maybe Kung Pao chicken. “Chinese!” he said happily.
Aeryn waited while he tried a sample.
Close enough. He didn’t ask what it was made of. He’d learned that a long time ago, too.
He ordered plates for them both, and got a couple bottles of fellip nectar. The being behind the counter loaded up a tray, and Aeryn led the way to a table in the center of the stalls.
“Now see,” he said, setting the plates and bottles of fellip nectar onto the table, “this is like Earth, too. Food on the outside,” he said, sweeping his hand around at the stalls, “tables on the inside.” Okay, so it was a superficial similarity and these tables were made of something he’d never seen before, and the chairs were too low, and lumpy besides….
Aeryn smiled at him, or maybe at something only she knew.
He looked at her sideways, and then leaned over to slide the empty tray onto a neighboring unused table.
“Eat,” he told her, slightly annoyed. And for a while, they ate in silence. John thought it was surprisingly good.
“Don’t you like it?” he asked, when he saw she was only picking at the food in front of her.
She looked up and scrunched up her face in something that he thought was in fact a wistful smile. “Actually, it’s very good,” she said, poking at it some more.
John watched her for a few minutes, then put his utensil down across the edge of his plate, the way his mother had taught him.
“Aeryn,” he said softly. “What’s wrong?”
She put her utensil down too, following his example, and looked at him. “Nothing is wrong.” She took a breath and said, “I told him I would go to Earth. The day he died.”
“I know,” John said, wondering why she needed to talk about that now. They’d talked about his other self’s death before. Out of curiosity, he asked, “Would you really have gone?”
She answered promptly, as if she’d given it some thought. “Yes. If he had.” She paused a moment, looked down at the food again, and then continued, “I might have liked it.”
John found that strangely disconcerting. Was he just feeding her sense of loss? She certainly wouldn’t ever be going to Earth with *him.*
After another pause, she asked, “*Would* he have gone? To Earth, I mean?”
Surprised at being asked, he thought about it for a moment. “No. Not the way things were. There was too much here to be done, Scorpy, Scarrans, stuff, you know.” The “stuff” *they* had been dealing with, had dealt with.
He ate some more food, pretending this conversation wasn’t disturbing him.
She watched him for a moment, then asked quietly, “Will you go?”
Some small, hopeful part of his heart that he’d never quite managed to kill suddenly popped up and whispered to him, This is what this is all about. Would you leave her like he did? He’d better tell her the truth, better *know* the truth himself.
“To Earth?” he asked, stalling. When she nodded, he dragged his hand across his face and looked around the food court. He thought about the food in front of him, the memories this place had stirred in him, the danger his presence would probably be to Earth, if he were to go back. With or without her, he realized, the UTs were his home now. The similarities were comfortable, the differences were – okay. “No,” he told her honestly. “Why would I want to do that? I’ve got beer and Chinese food right here,” he added lightly.
Aeryn nodded and picked up her utensil again, took a bite of food, a good-sized one this time.
John watched as she cleaned up a palm-sized patch of her plate. She took a swig of fellip nectar, and looked him in the eyes.
“I miss you,” she said softly.
He closed his eyes, afraid the gentleness in her face would lead him to tears. He didn’t want to cry, not now. But neither did he want to alarm her, so he opened them again. “I miss you too,” he told her.
Aeryn smiled faintly, tears shining in her eyes, now.
He couldn’t bear to see her cry, he had seen too much of that in the past half cycle. He stretched his hand out to cover hers where it rested on the table.
She lifted her fingers off the table, bringing them up along his, leaving their hands on the table with their fingertips resting together. She looked hopefully at him.
John thought about it for all of half a microt. How could he *not* take the chance? He took a breath, smiled reassuringly at her, and twined their fingers together.
Aeryn bit her lip, and squeezed his fingers tightly, holding his hand as if she’d never let it go again.
He hoped she never would.
