One day, Matt was in a hat, and his mum told him to get out. When matt didn't get out his mum put the hat on. But unbeknowns to Matt, his mum didn't wash his hair that faithful morn,
and and from that stench a chick was born.
not your usual chick without dik,
but a mutilated chick, a chik with a dik!
"Wowsa" matt sed, with shok on her face.
"I have to report this amazing new race, to a mad scientist, with cum on his face."
Just then matts mum took off her hat with a look of disgust.
"stop using that language, you may make me bust!"
matts mum sed in a bit of a hurry,
then walked yonder with matt in the hatt with the intent to burry,
matt and his new little thing,
butt matt had his little hart set on having a fling,
with the neighbour next door,
which just happened to be Chasey Lain.
well, our young matt was in luck,
cos just at that moment she was looking to F*#k.
they had the best fork eva,
all up untill matt took out a knife and spoon. "what do you think this is, dinna?" cried the porn star, "we were supposed to have sex while i held this fork!"
well thankfully for matt, he got a second chance and sexed the porn star,
without his new pance. (pants)
then to comply with the rules Daniel made up a word,
kikkajubble, "which sounds quite ubsurd", sed the bird to the spider that wriggled and jiggled and giggled inside her.
there you go matt a story for you,
now i must go and doo a poo.

THE REVIEW:

Bronson K Volcomstalker: I'm pretty sure I said no poetry. And this is exactly the reason why. It should have been called: "Matt In The Hatt: The Ultimate Experience in Reading Horror" This could have been a good poem, had there not been some frightful errors. Some include: Rhyming 'dik' with 'dik' and 'face' with 'face' Implying Matt could have sex Too many mentions of cutlery Being shit Spike Firestorm: I just... no, this is too painful. I am so sorry.