Young Flower Girls and Ring Bearers are the most precious little things on two legs. They usually perform pretty close to task but even the little deviations in plan are usually well received.
For older children it is a great opportunity to address them directly. All children are different and that their feelings are important.
So don't stress if they seem apprehensive! It's just the adjustment.
“Often marriage is viewed as the union of two persons.
Yet marriages not only unite the Bride and the Groom, they unite families. With the changing structure of what a family is in today’s world we are offered unique and wonderful opportunities to increase the number of loving caring relationships we have in our lives. During a wedding ceremony rings are exchanged with a promise. Karen and John thought appropriate that their children should also receive a token of their promise to them this day. They wanted to find a way to let them know now how special and wonderful they all are in their own way, and how blessed they feel to be her parents. They also wanted them to have a physical reminder for the future that as they grow and become young men and women in their own rite, that their parents will always support them. There may come times when there are things going on in their lives that they may feel no other human would ever understand,
addressing children
but there is nothing that any of you can ever say that will not be met with unconditional love. So is the bond of trust that your parents establish with one another, and extend to all of you this day.”
Children step forward and recieve their gift
“Gina and Martin, will you now step up to the altar and hold close to your heart the container of sand representing the essence of all that you are and all that you bring to this union. As you do so, embody the grains with all your hopes and dreams for the future. Bring to mind the strength of your promises, the honesty and integrity with which you make them, and all the particles of personality that make you unique and wonderful in one another’s eyes.”
Bride and Groom come to behind the altar
and each take their own container of sand in hand
“Within a marriage each person is both their own and each others. Two individuals choosing to create a new life with endless possibilities and new dreams that are theirs together. Will you now pour the sand that is to represent the foundation of your love which is to support and nurture, your marriage and your family?”
Bride and Groom intermingle half of their sand
“Leah, will you join us please?”
The couple’s daughter joins them behind the altar
“This container, is here to represent you Leah, and your importance. Like colors of the rainbow we’re all different and special, valuable, and precious. Therefore it is only fitting that you be shown as an important part of this marriage after all marriage is really about family. So will you please pick up your sand and add it to your mom and dad's.
Leah picks up her container of sand and pours
Gina and Martin, will you now finish pouring your sand?
Bride and Groom pour the rest of their sand into the container
“And will you now seal the vessel as a reminder that nothing is more important nor more sacred than the bond that you share as husband wife and family. Leah, do you see where you all are. You are in the center of your mom and dad‘s hearts, now and forever.”
And everyone comes back to the front of the altar
(Leah was very young so the parts that address her are worded for her to understand. With older children age appropriate wording is usually used)
“Beth and Kim as a demonstration of your love and support of this marriage, will you now step up to the altar and light candles representing the separate families and family history’s that are also today to be joined together as one?”
Bride and Groom's mothers come behind the altar and light the tapers representing their family then return to their seats
“Michelle and Alex, will you now come to the altar as Husband and Wife?
Bride and Groom step behind the altar
The flame that your mothers have lit for you represents more than their blessing alone. It also speaks of the spark of divinity that lives deep within you both. It is a reminder that in marriage it is your higher selves that you are promising to one another and the very best that you have to give always.
From every human being there rises a light.
When two souls destined for each other, find one another,
their streams of light flow together
and a single brighter light goes forth from the united being.
These two candles are symbolic of separate people in their own right.
Bride and Groom pick up their tapers
By the joining of two candles into one,
Bride and Groom light the center candle
this symbolizes the strength and the unity of two joining together to become one, depicting Michelle and Alex’s belief that together they can become greater than each could be alone.
Bride and Groom place the tapers back in their holders,
Prior to this moment you each walked a separate path. Now as the Unity Candle symbilizes, you shall embark together on a shared path. Yet the journey is not your alone, for you have already beem blessed with three beautiful children, and it is the strength of your love that shall nourish you all together as a family. Joshua, Sandy and Kyle will you join us in lighting the Family candle?
Children step up to the altar and together with their parents, they light 'The Family Candle' the shorter pillar that sits in front of the Unity Candle. Leaving the tapers lit they encircle the two center pillars as a sign of support and individuality within the unity of family
The past the present and the future are all here, in glowing tribute, as a reminder that there is nothing more sacred than the bond that you all share as a family.
(If not including all 3 generations then we just edit to what works)
Chalice is held up for all to see
“The chalice is a symbol of Divine Love, the well spring or vessel
of the heart, of rebirth, creation and limitless potentiality
Chris and Ron take the chalice
They face each other, each with both hands on the chalice
Chris, drink of Ron’s love and let it touch your heart.
Ron gives Chris to drink. Chris drinks, they kiss.
Ron, drink of Chris’s love and let it resonate through to your soul.
Chris gives Ron to drink. Ron drinks, they kiss.
By drinking in of the promises that you make this day ensures that neither of you shall ever again thirst for total love, acceptance, understanding or companionship. Now as you hold the chalice in your hands feel how great your love is for these children.
Ron and Chris put their feelings into the chalice
Nicky, Tina, and Amber, drink of your parents love and know that you are as you have been, a family. They love you more than words can express, and as time goes by remember, you all drink from the same cup.
Ron and Chris, still holding chalice together, give Nicky, Tina &
Amber to drink, The children drink, Parents kiss them,
Couple gives chalice back
Bread is held up for all to see
Bread is representative of the Earth’s bounty. As food nourishes the body, so does love nourish the soul. In this manner so shall each of you be as sustenance to the other.
Ron and Chris take the bread
They break off a piece of bread and together they feed each other.
They kiss, then give each of the children bread and a kiss.
Remember now, as you feed each other, you will never again hunger in your heart or in your soul. For families eat from the same plate and if ever one should be lacking the others will have plenty to share”
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