School Quotes
John Baker: And then they were like, "Hey, Carla, let's have a cow-eating contest! Why don't you eat three?" and then when she was swallowing it, it was like "AHH! Eat more chicken, bitch!"
Michael Clark: "Turmoil erupted today in the Plano West Auditorium as crazed stage manager Neil Doody chased the lead actress of Funny Girl across the theatre, who was screaming Cooter. Unfortunately, there frolic soon ended as enraged hippopotamus Carla Rich stepped in the path and ate them in one bite. This year’s musical promises action!"
John Skidmore: USC gives out so much money for scholarships! It's just like, "Here, you have some money because you have..........legs........"
Online Quotes
white x stars 13: geez ur hilarious u know that?
LepeRockOn: lol I am?
white x stars 13: no i was just saying that to feed your ego
LepeRockOn: you can't see it but I'm flipping you off
LepeRockOn: see that tiny little speck
LepeRockOn: yeah uh huh thats me flipping you off
white x stars 13: i want to have sex with that man
white x stars 13: NOT REALLY!!!!!!!!!!!
white x stars 13: hahahahhaa
white x stars 13: but i'm sure YOU wouldn't mind having sex with Orlando
white x stars 13: ;)
WhiteLady0fR0han: :-D
WhiteLady0fR0han: not at all
WhiteLady0fR0han: hehe
WhiteLady0fR0han: then Elijah could come
WhiteLady0fR0han: and Viggo
WhiteLady0fR0han: and Johnny
WhiteLady0fR0han: it would be good
WhiteLady0fR0han: :-D
Celebrity Quotes
Johnny Depp: "If someone were to harm my family or a friend or somebody I love, I would eat them. I might end up in jail for 500 years, but I would eat them."
Johnny Depp: "I pretty much try to stay in a constant state of confusion just because of the expression it leaves on my face."
Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow: "Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you've got to watch out for because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly stupid!"
Movie Quotes
FINDING NEMO
Dory: Have you seen a clown fish swim by?
Crab: Yeah, but I'm not telling you Bluey, and there's nothing you can do about it!
[Dory holds Crab out of water for the seagulls to see]
Seagulls: Mine! Mine! Mine!
Crab: Okay! Okay! I'll talk! I'll talk!
Dory: I wish I could speak whale.
Peach: That was the shortest red light I've ever seen!
Sheldon: I'm H2O intolerant.
Tad: I'm obnoxious!
Marlin: It's like he's trying to speak to me, I know it!
[to Squirt]
Marlin: Look, you're really cute, but I can't understand what you're saying!
LOVE ACTUALLY
Prime Minister: ...solving what really matters... to Britain. We may be a small country but we are a nation of Shakespeare, Churchill, The Beatles, Sean Connery, Harry Potter, David Beckham's right foot... David Beckham's left foot, come to that...
[Natalie, a servant, is greeting the Prime Minister. It's her first day on the job and she is very nervous.]
Natalie: Hello, David. I mean sir. Oh, shit, I can't believe I just did that. Oh and now I've gone and said "shit" - twice.
Prime Minister: Well, you could've said "fuck", and then we all would have been in trouble.
Natalie: Oh thank you sir. I had an awful premonition that I was going to fuck up my first day. Oh piss-it!
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