The Fat-Skinny Kid condition is less comical then the Monsterboy with a Tan especially because it is so widespread and, until some trauma shocks the man, basically permanent.

This is a condition in man that often stems from too much sexual intercourse or masterbation. The loss of too much semen causes a kind of insatiable hunger or thirst. This is because the body is falling behind in its ability to replenish its nutrient stores.

The outward symptoms of the Fat-Skinny Kid are:

• a puffy face that seems to be retaining water
• loss of hair
• loss of skin/hair color (everything dulling to a sort of greyish shade)
• Bitchiness and other negative, effeminate qualities
• loss of overall body-definition
• the constant need to eat, drink, get drunk or high
• when somebody asks you how you're doing, you feel the need to say, "very well thank you!"
• money is your god
• inability to go anywhere without your girlfriend
  some reasons for this particular sign:
  
  • you have in effect divided yourself in two and are now half a man, the other half residing in the woman into which you have been continually pouring that part (every time you fuck a woman you give her your energy and deplete your own)
  • you feel the need to offset your now shabby fat-skinny look with the presence of your girlfriend by your side, as if to say, "I may be a bloated, balding mess but lookie here, she likes me, so I can't be all bad!"
  • your over-sexing of this woman has resulted in her increased beauty, and your increased lust; she is much prettier than you are handsome and you know it, so you feel as though you must keep her in sight at all times to avoid her seduction by another man.
    

A side note: if you don't have a girlfriend and you're fat-skinny by your own hand, shame on you--because it means you're jerking it over 5 times a day!

With a girlfriend, on the other hand, sex over 3 times daily for a sustained period puts one at high risk.

The Monsterboy with a Tan condition can often rescue you from Fat-Skinny Kid simply by getting you dumped. That is what is so dangerous about the Fat-Skinny Kid condition. Some Fat-Skinny Kids never get dumped. But Monsterboys ALWAYS get dumped.

So the Monsterboy with a Tan is slightly preferable. As Nietzsche has said, "Un monstre gai vaut mieux qu'un sentimental enneyeux." ("An exited monster is worth more than a sentimental bore.")

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