| Alanna Goes Mad Written by Aeris |
| Alanna was forcing her eyes open with her fingers. As much as she loved Jon (as a FRIEND!) she was being board to death by his speech. Her eyelids began to flutter. She fell asleep. Long bubbly snores came from her nose and she began to grind her teeth. Her short red hair fell to her face and was blow away by her long, bubbly, and utterly nasty snores. Wine poured from her glass on to her face and she coughed in her sleep. She laughed high-pitched and began to mumble words in her sleep. The Lioness was sleeping soundly until a loud scream woke her up. “ALANNA!” Jon roared. “WAKE UP!” “Oh, I’ll wake up, when you are entertaining, honestly!” Alanna said mad from her awakening. She put her arms on the table and promptly crossed them and put her head on them. Long bubbly snores came from her nose and she began to grind her teeth. “That’s it! ALANNA! You want to entertain people then do so!” Jon said and sat down. Alanna crept up to the spot where Jon had been. The lights went out. A single spotlight was on her and she wore a strap that barely covered her breasts and a pair of pants that were to big for her. A microphone came in her hand, magically. She began to sing. “I can't get no satisfaction I can't get no satisfaction (“What in Mitros name?” Jon asked) And I try, and I try, and I try, and I try I can't get no, I can't get no satisfaction (“I don’t know what it is, but I like it.” Commented George.) When I'm drivin' in my car And that man comes on the radio And he's tellin' me more and more About some useless information Supposed to fire my imagination I can't get no, oh no no no Hey hey hey, this what I say (“What’s a car?” Asked Neal.) I can't get no satisfaction I can't get no reaction And I try, and I try, and I try, and I try I can't get no, I can't get no satisfaction When I'm watchin' my TV (“TV?” Raoul asked.) And that girl comes on to tell me how tight my skirts should be well she can't tell me who to be cause I've got my own identity. I can't get no, oh no no no I can't get no satisfaction I can't get no satisfaction (“She’s plum mad.” Said an unknown source.) I can't get no, satisfaction I can't get no, satisfaction I can't get no satisfaction baby.” Alanna paused and then said, “See Jon, this time can be used for good. Now, if you excuse me, I have a video to shoot.” Alanna said and walked out of the room. “What is wrong with this picture?” Kel asked Neal who shook his head dumbfound. “What’s a ‘video?’” Owen asked. “SHE’S MAD PLUM MAD!” The unknown source said. “CUT, cut, CUT!” Cried a voice. “The line is ‘she’s mad, she’s gone plum mad!’” “Sorry Dan lets try it again.” The unknown source paused and then started up again, “SHE’S GONE MAD, ah! Okay one more time, SHE’S MAD, SHE’S GONE PLUM MAD!” “Better,” said the voice, Dan. “Who are you people?” Jon demanded. “OKAY, who left these real Tortallan’s out here?” Dan asked. “Oupps! Sorry SIR!” Cried a raspy voice. “I’ll get them out now! Okay you bums, off the set!” “NO, NO, NO!!!” Jon yelled and covered his face with his hands. *** |