Total Request Live!! Written by SailorPluto7

I'm totally bored right now. I don't think anyone's ever done a Tortallan TRL before this, so if you want to use the idea, please ask me first! Please, please, please! Oh yeah, and I love Marky Mark and NKOTB, so I'm not making fun of them, I'm just saying that as musicians, they aren't exactly numero uno on the Billboard Chart...Oh, actually, some of these videos are retired from TRL really, but I put them on here just because this is supposed to be a cheesy knockoff. Oh, and AJ really is my favorite Backstreet Boy! So, AJ fans, please don't flame me for the cowboy hat thing!

Jon: Hi, I'm Jonathan Daly, your host! Welcome to TRL on TTV! We're trying to beat out MTV here on this station, so bear with me here while we get our videos started. Today, we have a great show planned for you! New Kids on the Block is in the house (pauses for screaming to start, but it never does), and we're gonna chat with Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch! We couldn't get any popular stars, MTV already had them. But now, let's get the countdown started with our number 10 video! Today, it's Thayet Spears with "Don't Let Me Be the Last to Know." (screaming fans showed on screen as video starts.) Thayet (on beach, in bikini): Don't, don't let me be the last to know! Don't hold back, just let it go! I need to hear you say...you need me all the way. (Jon slides by, on the surf board, his shorts low enough to reveal a little too much...) Jon: Umm, we'll stop that now! I've sued about that shot, don't worry, people, I know you all just love to look at my cute ass, but I think it's an invasion of privacy! Ok, next, at our number 9 video, we have Limp Bizkit, starring Roger Durst, singing "Nookie!" Roger (on stage like Fred in video): I did it all for the nookie! So you can take that cookie, and stick it up your *yeah*, and stick it up your *yeah*, and stick it up your *yeah*! Jon (cutting in again): Well, people, sorry, but we have to take a commercial break here, but we will return in a moment! (stupid, pointless commercial break) Jon: Hi, I'm Jonathan Daly, and welcome back to TRL, Total Request Live! Before we go to our next video, let's go to TTV News, with Gareth McFayden. (cut to Duke Gareth, sitting at table) Gareth: Hi, I'm Gareth McFayden and this is TTV News. Today, in Tortall, yet more news of the very scandalous love affair between Buri Moore and Raoul Dorough. (hehe, a pointless attempt at humor on my part) Dorough, a singer for the group Backstreet Boys, declines to comment, as does Ms. Moore, who's self-titled release came out just recently. For more TTV News, tune in at 10 to the hour, every hour. (cut back to Jon) Jon: Well, how scandalous. Now, today is a big day here at TTV. It seems that either Backstreet Boys or newcomer Alanna Ford has beaten out *NSYNC's "Pop" for the number one spot. Which one is it? You won't get it from me. Now, here's our number 8 video...speaking of Buri Moore, here's her hit single "In My Pocket." Buri (standing in the middle of a K'Miri dance club): Nothing but pennies in my pocket, nothing but faith to keep me warm! (K'Miri dancers move out to dance) (cut back to Jon) Jon: We're trying to be like MTV, and show as little of each video as possible, and sometimes nothing at all! So, the only normal video on this countdown is at number 7, and we're just going to tell you what it is, not show it. Lifehouse's "Hanging By a Moment." Congrats, guys! Now, please welcome NKOTB! (NKOTB walks out) Jordan: Hey, where's Carson? Dude, isn't this TRL? Jon: Yeah, this is, but it's TTV! Tortall Television! Oh, and Jonathan, you have a cool name! Joey: You mean that this isn't MTV? Dude, we're outta here! (NKOTB exits) Jon: Ok, so much for that. Well, here's a word from our sponsors. (cut to commercials, then back) Jon: Now, to your number 6 video, it's Daine Aguilera's "Genie In a Bottle!" Daine (rolling around on the beach): If you wanna be with me, baby there's a price to pay! I'm a genie in a bottle, you gotta rub me the right way! Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh! (cut back to Jon) Jon: Well, umm, that's enough of that. There's been a lot of rumors lately about me and Roger Durst fighting over Ms. Aguilera, and I would just like to say, that the Eminem song is *not* a vertiable source of information! Ozorne Mathers is obviously a sick, sick individual who needs psychiatric help! Now, onto our number 5 video, it's, well Eminem with "The Real Slim Shady." (cut to video) Ozorne (in a room filled with black-robed mages): I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady, all you other Slim Shadys are just imitating! (Kaddar enters the video) Kaddar: So won't the real Slim Shady please shut up? Please shut up! Please shut up! Ozorne: Hey, you *@#^($#(*$&@#$(@)#*@(#*$*&^#&$...... (cut back to Jon) Jon: Well, we didn't have time to edit that one, sorry...but, after our commercial break, we talk with Marky Mark, and your top 4 videos.....all coming up on TRL! Jon: Ladies and gentlemen, now, you all remember Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch? Well, put your hands together for some old-school rap...it's Marky Mark! (Mark comes on) Jon: Hey, Marky Mark! Mark: Yo, dude, it's Mark Wahlberg now. I'm a serious actor. Jon: Whatever...so, now that you're into acting, have you given any thought to returning to the music scene? Mark: How many times do I have to tell you! I'm never going back to music! No more Funky Bunch! Ok, I'm a serious actor! I don't appreiciate you bringing this up, Carson! Jon: Actually, this isn't MTV, it's TTV, and my name is... Mark: What the hell? What, this is some cheesy knockoff of MTV's TRL where they bring people like me to boost their ratings? What's next, New Kids on the Block? Jon: Actually, they were before you.... Mark: Dude, you put New Kids up before me? I'm Marky Mark! You know, like, the Funky Bunch! Jon: I thought you wanted to be called.... Mark: Yo, I'm outta here! (Mark exits) Jon: O-kay. Well, now we're on to your number 4 video. Today, it's Kel Simpson, with "Irresistable." (cut to video) Kel (wearing a crop top, clutching her stomach): But he's irresistable, up close and personal! Deeper than spiritual, irresistable to me! (starts break dancing) (cut back to Jon) Jon: O-kay. That must have been a limited edition version of the video, cause I didn't see that yesterday! Well, we're going to take a commercial break, then bring you your top 3 videos! It's a battle between the Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC and Alanna Ford. We'll be right back, after a word from our sponsors! (another commercial break) Jon: Welcome back to TRL! We're going to take you outside right now, to where our VJ, Wyldon Holmes is, with some fans dying to get in here! It's freezing outside in Corus at this time of the year! (cut to Wyldon) Wyldon: Yes it is, Jon, and I'm here with some fans who are dying to meet you. Say hello, girls! (close up on Delia, Josiane and Varice jumping up and down with signs: Delia's "I LOVE LIMP BIZKIT! MARRY ME ROGER!", Josiane's "I LOVE YOU JON!" and Varice's "BSB AND NUMAIR RICHARDSON ARE #1!") Josiane: I wanna shout out to my friends in the Copper Isles Psychiatric Hospital in the Copper Isles, and say that I love you, Jon! Delia (cutting in front of Josiane): I just wanna say that I vote Limp Bizkit every time, and that Roger Durst is the hottest man alive! Varice: As if, Delia. I just wanna say that I voted BSB, because Numair Richardson is the hottest man in the world, and that Daine Aguilera can just kiss my ass! Marry me, Numair! (all three shriek loudly) Wyldon: Well, I think that you all have found your number one fans! Back to you, Jon! (cut back to Jon) Jon: Well, Josiane, I'm flattered, but my girlfriend Thayet Spears is watching right now, so I'll just move on...at number 3, they've slipped from number 1, it's Neal Timberlake, Cleon Chasez, Faleron Kirkpatrick, Owen Fatone and Merric Bass, aka *NSYNC, with "Pop!" (cut to video) Neal: Sick and tired of hearing all these people talk about (huh)....what's the deal with this pop life, and when is it gonna fade out (huh)..... (cut back to Jon) Jon: Well, since we're so short on time, I guess you won't get to see those hotties, according to the ladies, Cleon and Neal dancing in hot leather......so, now, for our number 2 video...there's a lot of suspense for this one, people...today, at number 2, we have... (drumroll) Jon: Alanna Ford's "I Wanna Be Bad"! Ladies and gentlemen........here it is, your number 2 video! (cut to Alanna, wearing leather hot pants and matching top, bouncing around) Alanna: I wanna be bad, and make bad look so good! (rapper, aka Liam, comes in, and they do the whole rap thing) (cut back to Jon) Jon: I'm sorry, that's my ex-girlfriend, so it's kinda hard to see her freak dance in hot pants with another guy... (wipes away tears) Jon: Well, after we get back, you're number 1 video! (commercial break) Jon: Well, before we get to that video, let's recap quickly....at number 10 today was Thayet Spears, number 9, Limp Bizkit, number 8 was Buri Moore, number 7, Lifehouse, number 6 was Daine Aguilera (blushes), at number 5, Eminem, number 4 was Kel Simpson, number 3 was *NSYNC, slipping from number one, at number 2 today was Alanna Ford, which only leaves one video left....ladies and gentlemen, it's the Backstreet Boys! (cut to video) (Gary, George, Raoul, Numair and Kaddar in an airplane hangar) Gary: I can see that you've been crying...you can't hide 'neath the lines...what's the use in you denying that what you have is wrong? George (with that AJ-like cowboy hat that I hate, even if AJ is my fav one): I heard him promise you "forever"...but forever's come and gone...baby, he would say whatever it takes to keep you blind....to the truth between the lines! All: I will love you more than that! I won't say the words, then take them back! Don't give lonliness a chance....baby, listen to me when I say, I will love you more than that! Kaddar: Baby, you deserve much better..what's the use in holding on? Don't you see it's now or never? Cause I just can't be friends, baby knowing in the end that.... All: I will love you more than that! I won't say the words, then take them back! Don't give lonliness a chance....baby, listen to me when I say....(hey!) Numair and Raoul: There's not a day that passes by... George: I don't wonder why we haven't tried! Numair and Raoul: It's not too late to change your mind... Kaddar: So take my hand, don't say goodbye! Gary: I will love you more than that...I won't say the words, then take them back, oh-oh! All: I will love you more that! I won't say the words, then take them back... (cut back to Jon) Jon: Well, what a great way to end our countdown! That's it for TRL today, tune in tomorrow, and vote for your favorite videos! Next up, it's Say What Karaoke, with surprise celebrity host Myles "Robin" Williams, on TTV! Bye! (picture fades as hundreds of girls throw themselves behind Jon and scream, jumping up and down)

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