I have to write this piece because my guy friend, whom I'll call K9, has complained to me that I write about relationships only from the female perspective. And that's true, I admit it. But hey, I need somewhere to sound off about how terrible men are, and it helps that I have crummy ex's to shine as my examples.
But, I will concede that K9 is right: I am the first to admit that women are extremely duplicitous creatures, and that there are plenty out there to give us cool gals a bad name.
In fairness's name, I have decided to allow others to express their opinions, feelings and experiences, and I invite other readers out there to do the same. This website is open to all.
So this began with K9 commenting on my site, and somehow led to how women have their own set of double standards that they apply towards men, and how unfair that is, considering that we spend our time bitching about men's double standards. I wanted K9 to elaborate on what he meant, and here is his take on it.
"They always want equal rights this, equal rights that, but it's, 'Honey, open this; Honey, take out the trash; Honey change the oil in my car; Honey go to the store and get this.' We as men have to open doors, pull out chairs, things like that. Now, I'm not saying we shouldn't, but note the courtship process focuses on a man always doing the work to impress the woman, historically speaking. So women always complain about double standards but never seem to realize that yes, some double standards benefit men, but there are a lot of them that totally benefit women."
My opinion on this is that he is right to a point. I can think of a few women I personally know who expect to be treated equally, but who also feel that being romantic (and hell, even courteous!) is all in the man's department; his chance to show that is NOT like all the other cads out there. I have heard women say, "If he's not romantic (or doesn't pull out my chair, etc), I want nothing to do with him." But I have yet to hear them say anything about their own obligation to respond in kind.
For me, there's nothing wrong in switching traditional roles; sometimes, I DO enjoy opening the door for my man, and I also get a kick out of planning romantic dates. I admit that I need the romance; for me, a romantic evening, or what have you, shows me conscious effort on a guy's part, shows me that he's paying attention to me and my desires. But by the same token, I understand that he must have his own need for romance and that I should take the initiative and make it happen for us. And that's the way it shoud be!
There's more! Continue Reading
