And we did. We stayed for about two more hours, talking to everyone, enjoying the exhibit. But I was a little nervous on the drive home. Morrigan was quiet. We made small talk for a while about the exhibit, and she could tell I was pretty anxious about this whole thing. She didn't want to drive anymore either. She pulled off the next exit that had a Holiday Inn or Radisson Hotel nearby, and ordered a room and dinner. But she had the suspicion that after she tells me everything, I wouldn’t be that hungry, and she was right.
So I told him. I began with my mom. I told him how I found out many years after her death, she had many friends as dad found out at her funeral. People he never met, offering their condolences and sympathy. But I was too young to fully understand everything. I told him of my father's death, then of Michael and what I believe I caused. My devastation was getting worse; I did not want to be around anyone. I felt I was causing everyone I ever loved to die. I was glad my aunt and uncle were willing to let me stay with them, but I knew I did not want them to die too.
Then, I found a way out. I had just turned seventeen when a man who said he knew my mom approached me. At first I thought it was just some sicko. Then he mentioned names. He said my mom had a gift, and that I did too. I had remembered my father telling me the same. After he introduced me to the ‘Community’, and to certain members, I joined. The Community was an organization based on the principles of ‘The Creators’. An ancient doctrine which taught the philosophy of the human being’s ability to create. Although many human civilizations adopted the philosophy throughout the years, greed or tyranny destroyed it. The doctrine survived, but in the year 1600, the Catholic Church had acquired it, quickly deemed it heresy and ordered it destroyed. But fortunately it wasn’t. A member of the church had burned a fake in front of the witnesses, at the risk of his excommunication from the church or imprisonment. After almost two hundred years it was discovered in Japan, by a young ukiyo-e artist named Utamaro Kitagawa. Supposedly, he had the doctrine translated and passed several to his friends. The original was later rediscovered again in France, in a shipment of “Shunga” books he had published. Although he had paid dearly for his art, The government considered it pornography. He was jailed for approximately 50 days. Humiliated and having his spirit broken, he died shortly after in 1806.
The secret “Community” was created in 1863 by Camille Pissarro, who in turn had rediscovered the doctrine and found out about these so called “Muses”. He invited many other impressionistic artists of the time to join. Now there were hundreds of members, worldwide.
There were testers, people who would volunteer to see if I had this ability. He told me who he was and who he represented. Two days later I left my aunt and uncle's house, and never looked back. I told Jarod of the ability to influence. But that's by command. There was something else. My presence. It sounds stupid, but not even a so-called 'Muse' has anything on me. It's why those people at the festival surrounded us. It's not like I give off some pheromone because there have been tests where I have been put behind a concrete wall. Told to walk to the right... Walk to the left, stop. They were checking the brain patterns of the subjects on the other side. There was a definite increase of brain activity. They can't explain it and neither can I. I can just feel it though. Then I told him of the others. The ones I nudged in the right direction, and those I've help to rise again.
"Like you are trying to do with me..." He was speechless. Flattered, but speechless. He sat down on the bed and Morrigan sat next to him. He knew what was next.
"There's going to be that day you leave though, isn't there?"
"Eventually..." I wasn't thrilled of the idea, but he also could see that I had to... Eventually.
"But I need you to see that you have this in you! I can bring it out, and that's what I want you to do! I want to be there and nourish this gift within you. After a while you will be able to do this on your own. I'm not planning on leaving anytime soon, so please can you give me this?"
I told her yes. She was thrilled, but I wasn't. I know she could tell it from my face, and I wasn't going to hide it. This dream woman was going to leave sooner or later.
"Jarod. Look at me. Look at me. Please, try to understand, I'm not just doing this for me. It's for you too-"
For the next couple of years, it was more of the same, I wrote, painted, studied... We even went to Europe for a stint. But she was there. Morrigan had always been there. She didn't freak if paint got on the carpet. Or if I had friends over, which I acquired quite a few. If she seen me frustrated, she'd know the perfect way to distract me. In the beginning, I could look at her and not see anything, but the anger I portrayed on the world. Now I see someone I could not have survived without. I asked her;
"If I did not get in that accident, would you still be trying?" She told me no;
She said I would have been dead by now.
<---Previous Next--->