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| Famous Author Lee Bik Wah Writes Letter to Leslie Translated By Kelly Kwong On April 1st: We can never smile again on April fool's day. On April 5th: 'Tsing Ming Jit' (Tsing Ming Festival) -the city of people who died unjustly will receive a new soul. On April 8th: You became a fistful of fire. A gather of ash. You really are gone: never look back. I wish you to release your soul. Forget all vexation and anguish. Find your own happiness. Remember to drink three cups of 'meng po chai' (forgetting tea), and start again. Though your love ones, intimates, relatives and friends, working pals, fans who admire you......even a stranger who pass by will all miss you but you decided. What else can we say? That definitely was not you! I don't believe that. You scared of death, scared of heights, loved beauty, cared about your health. Always go to the gym, play badminton (I assume it is badminton), play majong, travel, taste red wine, always enjoying life. I cannot imagine how much courage and how definite you are when you choose to jump down from 24th floor. Because. We -everybody- know the consequences of that action -limbs and brain everywhere, accompanied with flesh and blood...... I am especially hateful to be outside the front of Mandarin Hotel today, under the destroyed fence -your body indeed knocked down the strong metal. A stranger used a strong hose to wash away your blood. In a splashing red shower -everything washed away. You followed the water and vanished. I hate his action. You: wearing an apricot suit with blood all over you. Covered with a white cloth. The blood leaking out like a pack of powder blush. As if your pale face has put on strong makeup. After that, you were covered by a bamboo blanket. And then, you were sent from hospital to funeral home. Then you were gone with the fire. I read reports from websites and some articles that states "Cheung Kwok Wing "had passed"." With two simple words inside a bracket -it makes people mournful. You a person was born, grew up, tried hard, did his best, adored by everyone, with fame and wealth, all kinds of emotions and love...... After forty years of hardness, it is considered to be a long journey. But it only takes a week, or even a second to let everything became "The Past". Life is analogical to wind, frost, rain, and snow, young men and experienced life, pink beauty and old man. You were so decisive. No one on earth can see your hair turns white. Therefore everyone will be aged and ugly. You remain as the most adorable one among the mass. The legend. Who only has cheerless beauty and deep love, but will avoid the yearly scars. When people in Hong Kong are all suffering through SARS. When everyone on the street are wearing masks. When everybody's thoughts are on life, and its value. Only you can leave without looking back. A weeping reader sent me an e-mail, wrote "Handsome and loving 'Sub-Yi Siu' (Sir Twelve from Gorgor's movie) is gone. All of you have to take care of the saddest 'Yu-Fa' (another character who's played by Anita Mui in Gorgor's movie)! Please be responsible and don't let me worry." Anita Mui once said, "Gorgor is the only intimate in my life." You do not like people to address you as Leslie or Cheung Kwok Wing. You love people to call you "Gorgor." A hold over from when you grew up in a family with a distanced relationship between your parents. You wanted to be loved and not to be ignored. Therefore the nickname, "Gorgor," gives you an "intimate feeling". With 'Ah Mui' (Little sister/Anita Mui) this was at its most meaningful. When I called her, she was reading scriptures to bless you for a second life. She was calm compared to before when she was crying like crazy. Her sister and her best friends left her one by one, and now her only intimate, best friend, brother left without a word. Just like the movie. Instead your switched characters. Do you know how cruel you are? I said to Ah Mui, "You have to be tough, don't think too much, because this is his decision." Her voice was hollow, "I don't get this. I can't accept this. We all love him, but he didn't respond. Couldn't reach him on his phone. Even his number has changed." "Sometimes when a whole bunch of people was eating, he would suddenly walk away. At that time, he was like another person......" You always asked yourself, "I didn't do anything bad during my life. How come it turned out to be like this?" Ah Mui and I heard this sentence lot of times. Now everyone around you hates himself or herself because "We didn't do enough". Your wish is to become a director. Yet nobody wanted to invest because the script is not commercial enough. Then, a wealthy businessman from China promised to support you. You were so excited. Nobody would know, he was to be found guilty of some crime and now in prison. In that moment your emotions were so distracted. People said that you were bothered by vicious deed. It was not and should not be related to the horror movie "Inner Sense" you were in. You are a professional actor and that movie finished long time ago. Because you mentioned to 'Siu-see' (Professor Lo Wai Luen) and 'Sin-jie' (Bak Suet Sin) that you really liked the soup opera called "A lady in my family." Shot twenty years ago, you wanted to re-shoot it. The first time we worked together -we won International acclaim. So last year on May 1st, I tried every way I could to invite you to have a meeting at Tsui Feng's house. She was totally willing to support us. I suggested rewriting the script. The sexual desire can now be brought to the forefront. You wanted to cast Cheung Pak Zi 'Cecilia Cheung'' for her outlook and acting skills. She was a perfect match with the character of 'Sub Tsing Yak Zuk' because of her pure and innocence. Tsui Feng is the ancestor of "Depression." She knew that you were not right, and asked you to see a doctor and take medicine, rather than focus on exorcism. I comforted you, "If you didn't hurt anyone, never did any bad, that person who wants to execute evil acts on you has to pay his price, and it will be a double reciprocal on him. Evil cannot win goodness." I specifically picked May 1st, because it is "Labor Day". I said jokingly, "Everyone has to rely on himself to recover. As a director needs to work hard. We have to think about the script. We can only support you from behind the scenes. Hey, you don't have to take more than a year to recover, do you? I'll wait for you until next Labor Day in May 1st." But you were still depressed, gloomy, and your stomach acid was falling backwards. You did not have any motivation. You do not even want to meet others. Not until May 1st but you were gone April 1st. Director Chan Hoi Gor was shocked when he heard the news that you committed suicide, "Extremely shocked. Extremely sad! This is just exactly another 'Ching Dip Yi' (a character of Gorgor's movie), isn't it?" During spring, the weather in Hong Kong was abnormally cloudy and rainy. Temperature dropped and was a bit chilly. Our good friend and helpful teacher 'Siu-See' told me that you left a pack of memento in her place. They are some treasures, including some photos where you were playing the opposite sex as 'Yu Gei,' some of them never seen before and a letter. A letter? A letter of thanks for your contribution, sent by the Program Development Department of "Education Board" Back February 22nd of 2002, Hong Kong's Chinese University "Chinese Language and Literature Department" and "Hong Kong Literature Research Centre" ran a joint "Comparison of Literature and Image" Seminar within the Chinese faculty. Since 'Siu-see' was to retire, you promised her to present a speech of "How to deduce the character of Lee Bik Wah's novel." (I'm totally thankful to you!). The seminar was extremely crowded. All the professors from different faculties came and it was full of people. You respected the highly rated institution. Therefore no recording, taping, or promotions were permitted. During the interview you talked about the death of 'Ching Dip Yi," a character in your movie and my book. And you stated three reasons why Yu Gei's (another of your characters) choose to die. You said, firstly his personality is stubborn and therefore had to die in front of Ba Wong (Another Character). The second was Dip Yi wanted to use his death to end the original story. And thirdly -An adorable idol cannot accept that he will be aged. When I saw that, I was totally shocked. That day was the most glorious and alluring day before you became really sick in March. That was not the only occasion when an artist presented a speech in the University, but you were extremely smooth and humorous. It was just so memorable for the students. They all took notes quietly. For people who adored you, not only those that are around thirty or forty who grew up with you, there were those who were young. I hope that besides loving your singing skills, acting skills, your face, they can also learn from your merits: You: Had serious work attitude, always punctuation, respectful to elders, smart and emotional, courageous and innovative, kind and courteous, honest in love, honest in sexuality and always aimed for perfection. You always brought happiness to others and kept all the sadness to yourself. I know -you were lonely. You liked reading. There was a time when we were in the home of Sin-jie (Bak Suet Sin), 'Siu-see' mentioned that an article by 'Bak Sin Yong' (a famous novelist) was touching. You read it immediately in a corner. You were brilliant and smart. Others idols in entertainment could only hope to attain your level. You would have been an excellent director. We could tell from the music video of "Fung Wah Zue Dua". What a pity...... This article: is a gift for a friend who is gone. And I am so annoyed. You still owe me a film, and I still owe you a script...... When will you return it? |
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| www.goodbyeleslie.com |
| www.goodbyeleslie.com |