By the end of the day, both detectives were frustrated at their failure to locate Puchelli. They knew as nightfall approached, another woman would be in danger. The attacks were occurring more frequently and were more horrendous.
Starsky pulled into a fast food joint, not even bothering to engage in his usual good-natured ragging on Hutch. Nor did Hutch offer his predictable lecture about the ‘non-existent nutritional value’ of the food served at these greasy spoons.
The atmosphere in the Torino fairly crackled with the strain that had been building all day. Hutch, what’s the matter, buddy? Why can’t you open up and tell me why you did it? Starsky suspected Hutch was struggling with his conscience when he ordered a cheeseburger “all the way” AND a large order of fries. If he hadn’t been so miserable, Starsk may have even laughed.
They ate in silence. Their only conversation throughout the day had been directly connected with the case. Nothing personal—nothing risky—nothing that they both knew needed to be said.
Finally, Starsky couldn’t hold back any longer. As usual, his emotions took control, leaving him with no alternative than to meet the problem head-on. He gazed out the side window, not wanting to risk Hutch reading the pain in his face as he spoke.
“So, why’d you do it, Hutch? Huh? Will you just tell me?”
Hutch shifted in the seat, gazing out his side window. “Do what, Starsk? Fall for a woman that you imagined yourself in love with? For God’s sake, Starsky, every time you get involved with a woman, you think you’re in love with her. Don’t you know that you can’t go through life fooling yourself that the next woman you meet may be able to fill the void Terry’s death left in your heart?”
The anger flared through Starsky with such intensity, he could barely control his voice to speak. “And I guess you think you got my whole life all figured out. I don’t deserve a little happiness? You think that it’s okay to hop in the sack with someone hours after I bare my soul to you and tell you I think I’m in love with her? Damn it, Hutch, how could you do this to me? Huh? All the women you know, all the women you could be with, and you got’a have Kira?”
“Look, I didn’t plan it. Okay?” Hutch answered quietly. “I went over there to find out how she felt about both of us. It just...kind of happened. There’s something—I don’t know—something that I can’t describe. I’m just drawn to her, Starsk, like a moth to a flame. Hell, I can’t explain it to you! Why can’t you just bow out gracefully and let things take their own course?”
Starsky’s eyes hardened and seemed to turn a deeper shade of blue as he took a deep breath and tried to calm his voice before speaking. “Do you love her, Hutch? Huh? Can you really sit there and tell me you love her? Or are you lettin’ your libido speak for you? I thought you were my partner—my buddy—my best friend.”
Starsky’s voice was thick, as he struggled to keep his emotions in check. “Best friends don’t do one another this way, Hutch. How can I trust you now? Huh? Our whole relationship’s been based on trust.”
Suddenly, Starsky realized his feelings for Kira were no longer the issue. What he was really dealing with here was his fear that Hutch didn’t value their friendship as much as he did. He had never before had reason to doubt Hutch’s loyalty. Many times they’d risked their lives for one another, and they did it without a moment’s hesitation. It just didn’t seem possible that a woman they had known only a few weeks could shatter their friendship so easily.
Despite his intention to be adult about the situation, Hutch felt his own temper rising. From his perspective, his partner was blowing this way out of proportion.
“Why can’t you just grow up,
Starsk?” he snapped. The moment the
words were spoken, he knew that he’d give anything to take them back.
God, what’s happening here?
Where did that come from? Why
can’t I stop this whole ugly scene?
The anger drained from Starsky, quickly replaced by hurt and disappointment. “What ever happened to ‘me and thee’?” he asked quietly.
Hutch reached out and laid his hand on Starsky’s arm, “Look, buddy, can’t we just forget all this? This thing with Kira may not work out anyway. Just give me a chance to see if it’s the real thing. Is that asking too much?”
Starsky shrugged off Hutch's hand and turned to faced him. “Hutch, if you wanna be with her, knowin’ how I feel about her, I don’t think I wanna be your friend anymore. That may sound stupid to you, but to me, it's a matter of trust and a matter of loyalty. Without that, partner, we got nothin’.”
Hutch’s eyes went wide with surprise. “You can’t be serious...Starsk,” Hutch reached out again toward his partner, but Starsky withdrew.
The engine of the Torino roared to life as Starsky put it in gear and headed home.