Kill Switch

2/17/98
KILL SWITCH
‘Kill Switch A Review in Nothingness’
by C.Schmidt®

Disclaimer: This belongs to the Vancouver media. I did not write it just spread it around.....

Opening Season -

We see some diner and it is empty but for one dude, who is on the net and drinking coffee.. We end up seeing big bad criminals of the under world doing their business as each is contacted and for some reason. They all end up at that diner where the nerd is playing on his computer -- that is held together by duct tape and hair pins.... Weird things happen, mass shooting, explosions, glass every where... Wait wrong channel had it on the Olympics... No wait I had it right... It’s those boring Winter Olympics that are on now. You know the ones were we have yet to see a competitions but lots of those warm fuzzy fluff stories and mega commercials are always on all day..... OK back to the diner. Everything and everyone is toast, wonder why? Oh I know David was throwing one of those tantrums and kicked a garbage can.....

Cue Music-

" Atom by atom molecular beings. Transport me away to the place of my dreams. A point in space where time is still. Colliding worlds in limbo until. Extremis. The melting of minds a cerebral mesh. A union of liquid and virtual flesh. Automatan love, your caresses pneumatic. I'm a slave to your touch, my response automatic. The circuits burn out and the paradigms shift. Desolation...my emotions drift. Clarity fades and my faculties haze. Deep down traumas hound me for days. Extremis. Your reasons are noble. A quintessence of lust. In the arms of angels. My dreams turns to dust. Extremis Extremis I...don't want to hear about the future. I want to see it. I want to feel it. I want to taste it. Extremis."
'Extremis'
HAL And Gillian Anderson

Mulder and Scully show up at the diner and get the low down, then bounce ideas you know the same old same old. Then they find that one of the dead is not just the normal type of guy you’d find in a mass shooting as he is not just any guy mind you. He is the guy that invented the Internet if you believe Mulder. Then they leave but not before Mulder swipes the dead man’s computer.

SCULLY: That’s evidence Mulder!
MULDER: Yeah so what? I steel this stuff all the time... Oh look Scully a CD.... Let’s listen shall we?
SCULLY: It’s Twilight Time by the Platters! Some clue this is...
MULDER: Hey at least it’s not the Hokey Pokey....Wanna dance?
SCULLY: Nah I only dance to Cher songs... Well on occasion that one techno song...
MULDER: You mean that overseas song the cantio....Um The Mulder and Scully song?
SCULLY: No you dickweed, Extremis...

Next we see The Lone Gunman as they drool over the computer Mulder stole and talk nerd talk about stuff. Mulder shows them the CD while Scully reads the paper. Eventually Scully suggests they check the e-mail. They do and low and behold a clue.... This now leads them to a ware house type containment place. They drive then stop at the address on the illegally obtained e-mail. Someone is home cause loud music is blaring from with in. They enter and Mulder gets zapped by one of those electronic shock thingies... Scully chase the chick then tackles her, they fight, Scully wins. Back at the room with the cool computer stuff and lots of bottled water they question the chick with black eyes....

BLACK-EYED CHICK: How did you find me?
SCULLY: We’ll ask the questions if you don’t mind.
BEC: Bite me! I don’t have to answer anything I plead the fifth unless you give me immunity.
SCULLY: Can’t do that ma’am, only a special prosecutor can. We don’t hold that type of power just guns. Oh, and you my dear are under arrest.
BEC: For what?
SCULLY: Assault on a federal officer resting arrest shall I go on.....
BEC: Hey I’m an American and have rights and you don’t have a warrant.
SCULLY: Don’t need one we are with the federal government and can get Starr to give us one whenever we want so hush up and answer my questions before I have to bitch slap you.
BEC: Oh no, look!
MULDER: At what?
BEC: The PC Monitor we are being targeted by a weapons star wars surveillance thing that is real high tech we better get out of here.
SCULLY: Yeah right, she is lying Mulder all our weapons stuff is aimed at that nut in Iraq not us...
MULDER: Nah Scully I think she is right RUN!!!!!

They all haul ass to the car and Scully floors it before the building is blown up. Later we see them driving and trying to get info from the black-eyed chick. She however is being a smart ass and only reveals that she was once a bass player for the band now known has Hole. Scully starts getting pissed and pulls off the road at a rest stop and gets out of the car, Mulder follows....

SCULLY: You believe this load of crap don’t you Mulder?
MULDER: No, I don’t think she was a bass player for Hole they all died from heroin overdoes.
SCULLY: Mulder she is full of shit, those type of defense platforms don’t exist.
MULDER: Yes they do I saw them on TV when we kicked Sadam Husan’s ass.
SCULLY: Those were different things. The stuff she was spewing about was never built. No money, the government was lying to boosts its power that and we owe Kenneth Starr a shit load of money. Besides if these things were real why aren’t nuked now by them.
BEC: Because it don’t know where we are.
SCULLY: Huh?
BEC: You are a crazy woman driver and lost it, good show. It doesn’t know how to find me.
MULDER: Then how did it know where you were before?
BEC: Because you idiots used Donald’s computer to try and contact me only Donald...
SCULLY: Hey who you calling an idiot Ms. "I don’t know how to put on make up?"
BEC: Well I haven’t used a phone in ages or a mirror for that matter and the only people that know how to contact me are Donald and David...
MULDER: Who is David?
SCULLY: You are don’t you remember?
MULDER: That is in the real life right now we are playing Mulder and Scully and I’d prefer to play Mulder and Scully *do it* wouldn’t you?
SCULLY: Bite Me Mulder! OK Black-eyed chick spill what the hell is going on?
BEC: We created an artificial life, like in the movies, and now it is reeking havoc on the net where is Donald?
MULDER: He is dead.
BEC: Oh that’s great now there is no way to stop it.
SCULLY: Show her what we found.
MULDER: Oh yeah we found this CD, "Twilight time" in the burnt remains of Donald’s computer.
BEC: Thanks that’s it, the Kill switch.

Mulder and Scully take the black-eyed Chick to see the Lone Gunman. Frohike goes gaga and drools every where. Scully gets jealous. Lots things are talked about Scully says they should call the virus up on the phone but is out voted. As things turn out Mulder and Scully steal government info on where all the T3’s are and go a virus hunting... Must be virus hunting season in Virginia as that is where Mulder goes. Mulder finds something weird and goes to get a better look. Meanwhile back at the Lone Gunman pad they all botch up and fall asleep letting the Black Eyed chick escape. Somehow she got out of the handcuffs and now holds Scully at gun point. I say she used her tongue....

Back to Mulder, he found an old house and calls Scully. Scully doesn’t feel much like chatting, well being held at gun point often does that to one. The black-eyed Chick tells Mulder that she going to find David and hangs up. Mulder in the meantime finds an abandon winnebago in the middle of no where. Scully and the black-eyed Chick find David’s house burned to the ground. While the Black-eyed chick morns the death of her lover Scully gets the keys to the handcuff and un-locks her self but pretends she is still cuffed, she is buying for the right time to beat the tar out of the black-eyed chick.. But all is for not as the black-eyed chick basically tells Scully to shot her and put her out of her misery.

We cut to the winnebago and Mulder triggers the alarm and something scans the net for info on Mulder as he unwittingly gave his prints when ringing the doorbell..... Meanwhile Scully and the Black-eyed chick make nice and have a sweet girl heart to heart talk. Scully tells the black-eyed chick all her make up secrets and the Black-eyed chick gives Scully some computer jargon to impress the Lone Gun Man with. The black-eyed chick also explains some other unimportant things like the plot.... Back at the winnebago Mulder breaks in and finds David then is assaulted by a computer.

Mulder wakes up in what looks like an ambulance. Later he is at a hospital and all the nurses look like porn babes of course the doctors are old and ancient not to mention are carrying power tools. Mulder freaks and demands they call "my Dr. Dr. Scully." He passes out and next we cut to Scully and The Black-eyed chick. They are using the phone, which is not a good thing in this episode as it usually leads to one being blown up up by those pesky defense surveillance platforms, but they need to find Mulder. And Mulder is usually easily reached by his cellar only not today as the artificial life as messed with Scully’s phone so they can’t find him. Mulder mean while wakes up to the porn nurse but only to find out he is now like Alex Krychek, a one armed man.

The Black-eyed chick and Scully sort of get an idea where Mulder is but on the way they lose Donald’s laptop as it is destroyed by that defense platform thing. Mulder is being messaged by all the nurses then realizes he as no arms. The nurses want the Kill switch and weird stuff happens Scully busts in and pretends she is Bruce Lee and starts kicking ass!

MULDER: Oh Scully I knew you’d show up. And Man can you kick butt!
SCULLY: Shut up Mulder see I always have to save you. Now do we have the kill switch?
MULDER: Wow Scully I’m so shocked I haven’t seen moves like that since the last Steven Segal movie. You are a shoe in for the Emmy this year, first almost dead from the Cancer now Jackie Chang...
SCULLY: Yeah yeah yeah sucking up will still not get you in my thank you speech for the Oscars. So where is the kill switch do we have it?

The cover is revealed as Scully is really not Scully but this not-Scully wants the Kill Switch ... So Mulder kicks her in the face and she fades away. Actually everything fades away and Mulder is really in that winnebago but all hooked up to the computer. Mulder starts screaming SCULLY and we cut to the real Scully and the Black-eyed chick. They found Mulder’s car and the winnebago. Scully hears Mulder screaming and at some point she shoots the alarm just don’t remember the order -could have been after she professed her undying love for him for all I know, shows ya how much attention I was paying. Hey. I was still shocked by the Kickboxer!Scully.

The computer injects Mulder with some drugs., to keep him quite, doesn’t work as Scully and the Black-eyed chick enter the winnebago. Scully is still gun happy and shoots the little robot thing. They get in there and find David then Mulder...Hey wait aren’t they same person? The CD ROM door opens, of course this all takes place after Scully and The black-eyed Chick talk about things, you remember that pesky thing called the plot. It, the computer, wants the kill switch. The Black-eyed chick hesitates then tells Scully she didn’t lose the kill switch. The computer does something to Mulder and makes him moan. Scully tells the Black-eyed chick to give it what it wants. Then grabs the CD and sticks it in. Twilight time starts playing and Mulder is released. Scully helps undo all the wires (I swear it looks like they start to dance), and the Black-eyed chick notices that they are now targeted. She tells Scully and Mulder to leave which they do. They run ... Run Forest Run.. Sorry wrong show, back to the winnebago, The Black-eyed chick hooks herself up to the computer and the systems fries as the black-eyed chick tries to upload herself. Then the winnebago is target by that defense thing we don’t have and blown away....

Closeing scene -

Mulder and Scully look at the charred remains and ramble on.

SCULLY: She’s dead.
MULDER: Maybe not.
SCULLY: Oh please, we saw the thing blow up there is no way...
MULDER: I know that part I mean what if she became part of the net.
SCULLY: I suppose that is possible I knew several hundred people that it as already happened to.
MULDER: Whao! You believe it is possible?
SCULLY: I said so didn’t I! Well, what I mean is there are net junkies everywhere and they have in a sense become one with their computer. I think some of them are now attached to the keyboards thanks to Steve Case and AOL when he lowered the rates to $19.99
MULDER: It’s $22.00 and you get crap! But no way! People really get hook like that you think? They really spend all day on the Internet, hours and hours of just cyberspace? Do they get cyber-sex?
SCULLY: Yep err wait I wouldn’t know about the cyber-sex or sex for that matter but yes to the first part of that question. They go into these things call newsgroups and mailing lists and in most cases talk about a fictional show like it was real and the characters. They even create groups that worship these fake people walk on or don’t walk on rather.
MULDER: That would be Vancouver right but this is weird ....
SCULLY: Well depends on whom you believe it might be LA next year. And Nah the whole worship thing is kinda cool cause I’m a Goddess and you are a God....
MULDER: Really?
SCULLY: Yeah , and I have more shrines then you.... Yahoo says I have 99 and you have a measly 41 or something....

Meanwhile The Lone Gunman get an instant message from Ester, "Bite Me!"

And somewhere in Nebraska a lone winnebago is in a white trash trailer park...........

THE END