He could hear the town before he actually approached it. It took a moment but he was finally able to make out the words.
"A witch! A witch! A witch! We've got a witch! A witch!"
A male voice rose up above the rest. "We have found a witch, might we burn her?"
"Burn her! Burn!"
"How do you know she is a witch?" Came another more reasonable voice.
"She looks like one." Was the reply.
"He."
"Bring her forward."
"Him forward, and I'm not a witch. I'm not a witch!"
Kunzite frowned and quickened his pace. That voice sounded awfully familiar. . .
"But you are dressed as one." The reasonable voice said.
"They dressed me up like this."
"No, we didn't -- no." Insisted the crowd.
"And this isn't my nose, it's a false one."
"Well?" The reasonable voice asked.
The question was answered by the same male voice that had asked if they could burn the witch. "Well, we did do the nose."
"The nose?"
"And the hat -- but she. . ."
"He."
". . . is a witch!" the man insisted.
"Burn her! Witch! Witch! Burn her!" The crowd called.
"Him!"
"Did you dress her up like this?" The reasonable voice asked.
"Him." The voice of the witch snapped in irritation.
"No, no... no ... yes. Yes, yes, a bit, a bit." The crowd admitted.
"She has got a wart." The man insisted.
"He! And I do not have a wart! My face is too beautiful to be marred by such a thing!" The witch growled.
"What makes you think she is a witch?" The reasonable man asked.
"HE!"
This time it was a different man that answered. "Well, she turned me into a newt."
"A newt?"
"I got better."
There was a pause before someone shouted out, "Burn her anyway!"
The call was taken up by the crowd. "Burn! Burn her!"
Kunzite wasn't sure but as he neared the village he thought he heard the witch scream out "Him! I'm a he!"
"Quiet, quiet. Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is a witch." The reasonable man said.
"He." The witch mumbled.
"Are there? What are they?" The crowd asked.
"Tell me, what do you do with witches?"
"Burn, burn them up!" The crowd shouted.
"And what do you burn apart from witches?"
There was a pause before someone shouted out, "More witches!"
"Wood!" Came another voice.
"So, why do witches burn?"
"B--... 'cause they're made of wood...?" Someone ventured.
"Good So, how do we tell whether she. . ."
"He."
". . . is made of wood?"
"Build a bridge out of her?" A man called out.
"Aah, but can you not also build bridges out of stone?" The reasonable man asked.
"Oh, yeah." The crowd murmured.
"Does wood sink in water?"
"No, no." Someone said.
"It floats! It floats!" Came a more enthusiastic cry.
"Throw her into the pond!" The crowd shouted.
"HIM!!!"
"What also floats in water?" The reasonable man asked.
"Bread!"
"Apples!"
"Very small rocks!"
"Cider!"
"Great gravy!"
"Cherries!"
"Mud!"
"Churches -- churches!"
"Lead -- lead!"
Kunzite was nearing the center of the town and had slowed his walk a little. He really didn't want to go any further but the familiar voice of the witch kept nagging at him so he continued.
"A duck!" Someone shouted out.
"Oooh" The crowd whispered in awe.
"Exactly!" The reasonable man said, "So, logically..."
"If... she.. weighs the same as a duck, she's made of wood!" Came the reply.
Off to the side Kunzite heard the witch mumble out an annoyed "HE's made of wood."
"And therefore--?" The reasonable man prodded.
"A witch!" The crowd shouted in unison.
"We shall use my largest scales!" The reasonable shouted.
Kunzite could see the crowd now as they swarmed out of the center. He followed them at a careful distance.
They had placed the accused witch on a hanging swing and a were holding a duck down on the other. He still couldn't see the witch but he could quite clearly see the villagers holding the duck's side of the scale down. The supports were removed but the scale would not tip.
"A witch! A witch! Burn her! Burn!" The crowd screamed as they shoved the witch towards a pile of wood. The witch tripped, golden hair spilling about before she managed to straighten herself. She turned slightly and Kunzite was finally able to tell why her voice was so familiar.
"Zoisite!" He shouted out as he fought his way to his lover's side.
"Kunzite? What the hell took you so long!" The man screamed at him as he tripped over the dress he was in.
A wizened looking youma came forward and stared at him closely. "Who are you who stands in the way of our witch burning?"
Kunzite stared at the creature, finally able to put a face to the reasonable man's voice.
"I am Kunzite, King of the Dark Kingdom."
To his surprise the youma bowed down. "My liege!"
Kunzite stared at the creature for a moment. "Will you allow us to pass?"
"My liege! I would be honored."
The two kings carefully made their way out of the town careful of the towns folk who kept trying to jab at Zoisite with burning sticks.
Author's Narration:
And thus Kunzite found a companion with whom to travel through the strange land. Zoisite could not account for how he had come to be in the town nor in the dress. Unfortunately they could not find a new pair of clothes so Zoi was forced to keep his feminine attire.