The truth will set you free
Ira
Buzzards and Gunship pilots, part 1
Rob wrote about flying both gunships and slicks (ed.note: Huey helicopters)
Did both too, and gotta agree on this one. Both jobs had their moments,
and I have mentioned before, I felt more vulnerable in Slicks; but I had
lots more opportunity to get killed in guns - for sure. However, I
loved the feeling of freedom in a gunship.
We had a couple of slicks that went down for mechanical problems down in
the Delta one day. I hung around to provide gun cover while they
patched them up. Because they were relatively new A/Cs, and I had flown
lead a lot when a Slick driver, I agreed to fly lead back home - to Bear
Cat. Must of looked funny, a Charlie model with two slicks up trail.
Anyway, I got bored, so I finally told chalk two to take lead
and that I'd see them at home. I peeled off, went into a dive, and
started to hunt for something, anything, just get me out of flying
formation. I used to pride myself on flying lead, and holding the
formation together. No more, I had gotten spoiled.
Rob, I long struggled with my conscience before I decided to send this
message because it is likely to cause you some emotional pain. A lesser person than I
might have simply let the matter pass. However, I am cursed by my character to always tell the truth, no matter the consequences.
It is necessary to shatter an apparent deep-set illusion, a self deception, that you
probably hold very dear. I am only doing this for your own good and to
reveal to you what I hope you will discover is a greater truth.Please, Rob, lie down here on the couch, take a deep breath, and try to relax. Ok, are you ready? Good.
I speak to you as a gunship pilot myself and here is the truth you must
know: the reason why a person ends up flying gunships is because he can not fly in
formation. Easy, Rob, easy! You're hyperventilating, big guy. Just take long,
deep breaths now. That it. You're doing fine.
It is important for you to understand that this condition is not your
fault. No one knows why gunship pilots can not fly in formation. Perhaps it is a
genetic deficiency. Perhaps it was a lapse in early childhood modeling behavior when we
missed the recesses where the other kids were playing follow-the-leader. Perhaps science can
answer this question some day.
I confess, I did not immediately recognize my condition. In my case, however, the Army discovered early my deficiency in the ability to fly formation. In
flight school, my handicap was obvious to my instructors.
During the introduction to formation flying at Ft. Wolters, while the other aircraft were
flying in a tightly bunched pattern like geese heading south for their winter resort, I was
flapping around, up and down, ahead and behind, a part of the flight in only the loosest
sense of the term. When the other aircraft were on short final to the stage field, I was still
at three thousand feet above Possum Kingdom Lake.
At Ft. Rucker, my condition was further confirmed. Even though one
civilian dignitary at the flyover during graduation ceremonies complimented the flight class
for its tightly coordinated missing man formation, he did not realize the empty slot was
mine and was totally impromptu. However, the Army knew the truth and I could not
escape it.
After confirming that my condition could not be remedied, the Army did the only thing it
could do to salvage its investment in me; it made me a gunship pilot. As you know,
formation flying is not a requirement for gunship pilots. In fact, a gunship pilot
idea of formation flying is two or more aircraft anywhere in range of visual contact
with one another and at approximately the same altitude, give or take a few
thousand feet.
So, in my case, I learned early that I was incapable of flying in formation and was only
suited for gunships. In your case, Rob, I believe you may still be in long-term denial.
It could be that you are an over achiever whose efforts masked your condition.
Please continue to lie there on the couch while I help you break through this
psychological barrier.
You will begin to realize the truth if you will simply consider your own words
objectively. Subconsciously, the inner Rob speaks the truth. For example, you said,
I loved the feeling of freedom in a gunship. Yes, that is the inner Rob, the real Rob,
speaking. Freedom is a documented code word among the formation flying challenged
for can't stay in position.
You said, Anyway, I got bored, so I finally told chalk two to take lead and that I'd see
them at home. I peeled off, went into a dive, and started to hunt for something, anything,
just get me out of flying formation. See there, you can not fight your true nature.
If you were a true slick pilot, you would relish the discipline of formation flying because
a true slick pilot delights in the precision of it and in his ability to line up on the skid cross braces of his neighbors aircraft like a pool hall hustler lining up the eight ball for the
sure shot to the corner pocket.
On the other hand, a true gunship pilot; that is, the pilot who lacks the ability to
fly in formation, sees formation flying as only a disaster in the making, like
a chicken invited to be a guest at a chicken hawk convention. You also said, I had flown
lead a lot when a Slick driver and I used to pride myself on flying lead, and holding the formation together. I ask you to consider that flying at the head of a formation is different
than actually flying in a formation.
For example, and speaking personally, I have come to realize that the reason why, even
as a gunship pilot, I was made a fire team leader, is so that I would be up front where
a wing ship pilot could keep an eye on me and have a reasonable chance of avoiding me
running into him. I am a living testimony that being a gunship fire team
leader is the ultimate acknowledgment of ones inability to fly in formation.
Finally, from your own lips, you provide the convicting Freudian slip. You say, No more
(slick formation flying), I had gotten spoiled. Yes, it's just as you say, when it
comes to formation flying, gunship pilots are rotten.
So, there you have it, the truth. I hope this session has been an enlightening one for
you, full of insight and self realization, and that, cleansed of your disillusion, you
can be free to live a richer and fuller life. Just as the ugly duckling found joy in the
discovery that he was really a long-necked goose, I hope that you may join me in finding
the joy of discovering your own true nature, knowing as I do that my lack of ability to
fly in formation, keep time to music, hold a steady job, or make any meaningful
contribution to society is because I am, by nature, a gunship pilot.
Now, don't you feel better?
Ira
The truth will set you free
Revised: April 15, 1997
Comments welcome.
All contents copyright (C) 1997, Ira W.M.
All rights reserved.
URL: http://www.oocities.org/Athens/Acropolis/1915
