Phrases you wish you could use at work:
- Ahhh....I see the cock-up fairy has visited us again.
- I don't know what your problem is, but I bet its hard to pronounce.
- How about never? Is never good for you?
- I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
- I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
- I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
- I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
- I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
- It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
- I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
- I'm already visualising the duct tape over your mouth.
- I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
- Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
- Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincedental.
- I'm not being rude. It's just that you're insignificant.
- What am I? Flypaper for freaks?
- It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
- You sound reasonable... Time to up the medication.
- Who me? I just wander from room to room.
- This isn't an office. It's Hell with flourescent lighting.
- I started out with nothing and still have most left.
- Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
- Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
- Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
- How do I set a laser printer to stun?
- If I throw a stick, will you leave?
- Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
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