HUMOR Digest - 9 Dec 1997 to 10 Dec 1997

Date: Tue, 9 Dec 1997 04:23:32 -0500
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: The Military

Following some duty overseas, the officers at the Fort were planning a welcome home party and dance for the unit. Being an all male combat force, they decided to request coeds from some of the surrounding colleges to attend.

The Captain called Vassar and was assured by the Dean that arrangements could be made to send over a dozen of their most trustworthy students.

The Captain hesitated, then said, "Would it also be possible to send a dozen or so of the other kind ?"

A Marine was in a dugout at the boundary fence in Guantanamo. He picked up the field phone and said "Gray Fox, this is Rabbit."

[no answer]

"Come in Gray Fox, this is Rabbit."

[again, nothing but silence]

Finally he stuck his head out of the dugout and yelled, "Hey Joe -- answer your damn phone !"

A Navy Chaplain found himself seated next to a slightly drunken sailor on the bus back to the Naval Station. The sailor slurred, "I'm not going to Heaven, because there ain't no Heaven."

The Chaplain didn't reply.

"I said," repeated the sailor, "I'm NOT going to Heaven 'cause there ain't no Heaven."

"Very well mister." replied the Chaplain. "Go to Hell then, but be quick about it !"

The Naval Aviator had just returned to London after some leave in the States and hailed a cab. After a while, he leaned out the window and shouted to the driver, "What the hell are you doing ?"

I asked you to take me to Leicester Square and this is the third time we've passed St. Paul's Cathedral."

"Sorry Governor." replied the driver. "I thought you was an American."

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