HUMOR Digest - 21 Dec 1997 to 22 Dec 1997

Date: Sun, 21 Dec 1997 03:10:32 -0500
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Moore Yuppies

A Columbia Maryland Yuppie was sent a ransom note saying that he was to bring $ 50,000 to the 17th hole of the Turf Valley Country Club at ten o'clock the next day if he ever wanted to see his wife alive again.

He didn't arrive until almost 12:30. A masked man stepped out from behind some bushes and growled, "What the hell took ya so long ?  You're over two hours late."

"Hey !  Give me a break." whined the Yuppie. "I have a 27 handicap."

The Yuppette watched from the beach at Hilton Head as her son built sand castles near the surf. The boy got up, took a few steps, slipped and was pulled out by a strong undertow.

"Help !  Help !" she screamed.

A Life Guard hearing her cries spotted the boy and ran the rescue. He dove into the pounding surf and finally pulled the child to safety on the shore. He then applied mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, and in a few moments, the boy began to cough.

"There ya are Miss. I think he'll be just fine now. But you might want to visit a doctor to be sure."

"Yes, yes !" she replied. "But he was wearing a new hat and sunglasses."

A Yuppie was standing at the country club bar with a tennis ball stuffed into the pocket of his shorts.

A lil' Yuppette next to him tapped him on the arm and pointed to the bulge and asked, "What's that ?"

"Tennis ball." he replied.

"Ohhh... ouch !" the Yuppette responded grimacing. "I know how that must hurt. I've had tennis elbow before myself."

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