HUMOR Digest - 10 Mar 1998 to 11 Mar 1998

Date: Tue, 10 Mar 1998 03:11:09 -0500
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Fathers

I figured out why they call our language the "Mother Tongue".

Fathers never get a chance to use much of it.


Say what ya will about healthy eating and all, but I've always found it awfully difficult to explain to JimJr Jr who's 6'4" to my 6' in height, why junk food is bad for ya.


One time my kids wanted to surprise me with a good breakfast in bed on Father's Day.

They put a cot in the kitchen.


If you think about it, Adam had more trouble than any of the rest of us buying his Father a gift for Father's Day.

I mean, what do you get somebody who's everything ?


I started early teaching my kids the value of a dollar.

From then on, they demanded their allowances in gold.


Y'all gotta watch yourselves with these on-line personal ads.

A friend of mine answered a glowing one from some sweet young thang who described herself as a "ready to boil-over sexpot".

Turned out, it was posted by his daughter.


Speaking of that, Mrs JimJr and I were on vacation in Ocean City with another couple one time. Max and I were walking along the surf eyeing the girls on the beach sunbathing.

As we passed one stunning blonde, face down on a blanket, Max remarked, "Boy ! Look at the butt on that !!!"

I said, "Max ! You old fool. That's Amy, your daughter."

He didn't look at another girl the rest of the weekend.


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