HUMOR Digest - 27 Mar 1998 to 28 Mar 1998

Date: Fri, 27 Mar 1998 02:58:43 -0500
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: HighJinx at State Highway

The State Highway Administration operates under the "merit system" which means to be promoted you have to take a test.

Having been successful and placing number one on the list, I asked my boss when my promotion would become effective.

Without hesitation he replied, "As soon as you do."

The Deputy Chief Engineer - Maintenance appointed the first female as a snow monitor. She was to ride the roads and report on current conditions in snow storms.

To mark the occasion, he gave her a white fur parka. He said it was to keep her "warm".

Personally, I think it was to keep her "quiet".

Senior Managers at the State Highway serve "at the pleasure" of the Administrator. One Administrator, trying to create a better line of communications, told his Staff, "Never be afraid to speak up and complain -- even about me -- & even if it costs you your job."

Like a lot of the older generation, there was a retired Army Colonel in the State Highway's Facility Management Division who was literally terrified of computers.

He was assigned one none-the-less and I showed him how to do a spreadsheet in Lotus that would finish a monthly report in less than a day, compared with three, doing it manually.

Instead of being elated, old Colonel Bob Beidleman moaned, "And whatever am I going to do the other two days every month ?"

Speaking of the Facilities Management Division (I was) during a Staff Meeting one time, a really pert and pretty female engineer named Rene told the manager of the Division, a Jim Keseling, "I'd like to get something off my chest."

"What's that Rene ?" he asked.

"Your eyes !" she replied.

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