HUMOR Digest - 4 Jul 1998 to 5 Jul 1998

Date: Sat, 4 Jul 1998 03:51:10 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: JimJr's Navy

Our Officer's Mess (dining hall) had subscriptions to various magazines. Once when a subscription was about to run out, a letter arrived from the publisher addressed to: "Dear Mr. Mess".

When I was awarded my wings, my Father said to my Mother, "Just think, the Navy gives him a $ 900,000 airplane to fly, and just last year, I was worried whenever he borrowed our Lincoln."

Even land-based sailors don't escape chipping, painting and cleaning. When I was at Pensacola, a sailor had just finished painting a small shed and was taking a smoke break. An officer happened by and asked why he was lounging around.

He replied, "I'm waiting for the paint to dry Sir, so I can scrub it."

I once noticed a Chief wearing a rating badge I wasn't familiar with. I asked him what it was, and he said he was a parachute rigger. Intrigued, I then asked how he got into that specialty.

"Well Sir," he replied, "Far as I know, it's the only job in the Navy where there are never any complaints from the user."

Not too often, but I guess just to stay qualified, the Division Commander himself would take out a flight. A group of pilots happened to be on hand to watch "the old man" land.

As luck would have it, he actually "bounced" the plane several times on the runway. I said, "Boy ! Look at him bounce !"

The squadron operations officer, an old-timer himself, said "Son, only junior officers 'bounce'. When the old man flies, you'll find it far more profitable to say 'Gusty out there today, isn't it ?'"

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