HUMOR Digest - 11 Jul 1998 to 12 Jul 1998

Date: Sat, 11 Jul 1998 03:20:54 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: The English

It seems the ratio of gays to straights has increased from 1 out of 10 to 1 out of 6 in England.

At that rate, I'm not sure at all that "there'll always be an England".

Back in the 60's when the economy was suffering in England, some consideration was given to selling the Rock of Gibraltar to the French.

All negotiations were halted however when the British learned the French were planned to rename it "De Gaulle Stone".

A couple comes out of a hotel in London & the doorman signals a cab for them. The pair get in and the doorman says to the driver, "Waterloo."

The cabbie says, "The station ?"

Icily, the doorman replies, "Well... it's a bit late for the bloody battle !"

Some of the most tactful people on Earth are English.

One office supervisor called a secretary in to give her the bad news that she was being fired. He started the conversation with: "Miss Symthe, I really don't know how we're going to get along without you, but starting Monday, we're going to try.

During repairs to Westminster Hall it was decided to cut the wood needed for the beams from the estates of the Earl of Warwick, where the original wood was cut in 1394.

When one of the engineers suggested a tall stately oak, the architect consulted his notes and said, "Ah... no... not that one. You see, we refused that tree the first time."

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