HUMOR Digest - 25 Jul 1998 to 26 Jul 1998

Date: Sat, 25 Jul 1998 04:03:41 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Bits of Wisdom

If a thing goes without saying -- let it !

A psychiatrist in Columbia Maryland recently reported that half of his patients went to him because they were married -- the other half because they weren't.

I was showing Mrs JimJr the high number of hits on my Web page and some of the "fan" letters I'd received containing compliments.

She took it all in and then said, "Just remember -- the very same people who praised Jesus also crucified Him."

Speaking of Jesus (I was), we had a guest Pastor one time at our Church.

Taking the pulpit, he said, "Today I've prepared a $50 sermon, a $20 sermon and a $10 sermon. We'll take the collection at this time to see which one the majority of y'all vote for."

A young budding Yuppette was discouraged because she had not risen in the ranks at her company at all. She sought the advice of a female executive over lunch.

"Well... Linda." the older and wiser Yuppette said, "There are two good ways of making it to top here. You can put your shoulder to the wheel, or put your head on the shoulder of the man at the wheel."

A young marriage counselor, haggard with the troubles of his clients, got into the elevator with an elderly but highly spirited senior consultant.

"How on earth do you remain so youthful and happy, sir ?" sighed the younger man, "Listening to all those unhappy people who end-up getting divorced most of the time anyway."

The older man shrugged his shoulders, "Who listens ?"

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