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HUMOR Digest - 4 Aug 1998 to 5 Aug 1998
Date: Tue, 4 Aug 1998 03:37:49 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: JimJr's Views on Life
Life is so very complicated I didn't even start to get a handle on what it's all about until recently.
I'm afraid now though, I've forgotten why I wanted to know.
The many different types of personalities can be reduced to two:
People who cause happiness wherever they go... Others, whenever.
The reason why children are so happy is now obvious to me:
they don't have any children of their own to worry about.
It seems cheerful people resist disease better than glum ones.
Or simply put, "The surly bird always catches the germ."
We have more food to eat in the US than any other country.
We also have more diets to keep us from eating than anyone else.
When ya think about it, a conscience is a lot like a wife:
If it can't stop you from doing something, it makes you regret it.
Household financial matters can be reduced to a single sentence:
When your outgo exceeds your income, your upkeep is your downfall.
The next time your mind goes blank, do all of us a favor --
turn off the sound.
Women claim that they never pursue a man.
Well, by the same token, a mousetrap never pursues a mouse, but the end result is the same.
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