HUMOR Digest - 18 Aug 1998 to 19 Aug 1998

Date: Tue, 18 Aug 1998 03:45:44 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Kids

In the old days, discipline for the kids was easy.

You just bopped them at least once every day.

If you didn't know why, they did.

I've found children to be a great comfort in your declining years.

Damn good thing too -- they "declined" ya faster in the first place.

The young Mother, tired of all the loud noise, tells her son to go outside and play with his friends.

"I only have one friend." he retorts, "and I HATE him !"

The paper here today sez that 1 out of every 35 adults in the US is either in jail or on probation/parole. Let's stop crime at the source -- join Planned Parenthood TODAY !

The little girl had just finished her very first soccer match & her Mother asked her how she liked the sport.

"It's OK, I guess." she replied. "But it'd be a lot more fun if the other team learned how to share better."

To any of you out there who've yet to have children. If you're still deciding whether or not to bring some into this poor old world, I highly recommend you go to lunch at some fast food place and sit next to a bunch of them.

The Mother was having more than a little bit of trouble with her pre-teen boy. She summed it up for him by saying, "Lloyd, you must live each day as if it were your last."

"No way !!!" he yelled. "I tried that last week and you grounded me."

  Return to JimJr's Postings Page

This page hosted by Get your own Free Home Page