TRM-1
During tuning, the tuner shall be re-calibrated so that the trumpets shall always be in tune.
TRM-2
a. Tempo shall be determined by neither the director nor the drum majors, but solely by the trumpets.
b. Any trumpet repeatedly playing a tempo which does not in any way relate to that of his fellow trumpets shall be awarded the trumpet medal of valor, to be presented at the band awards banquet.
TRM-3
Whenever the trumpets are playing Pep Band music, they are by definition playing melody.
TRM-4
a. When a trumpet player has lost all sense of rhythm and melody in a song, they shall immediately begin alternating between any first and open notes above C.
b. Should a trumpet player be unable to play notes above C, they shall be stripped of their horn and immediately denoted as an honorary woodwind with no possibility of parole.
TRM-5
All trumpet players incapable of reaching C above the treble clef by the end of marching season their junior year shall be permanently barred from the wind ensemble.
TRM-6
No trumpet shall ever be used to create the image of rustling wind.
TRM-7
Horse whinnies may be performed only by certified personnel.
TRM-8
All trumpet players remember, It Takes Two to Tango!!!
TRM-9
If anyone in the trumpet section makes any sort of mistake it shall be the fault of the last chair player.
The Foley High School "Mighty Band From Lion Land" Trumpet Section
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