PARDON ME WHILE I LAUGH

by Von Tilzer, Terker, & Heagney
as sung by the Happiness boys, Billy Jones & Ernest Hare


Were going to sing a song to you, it's not a song of love.
There's not a word that speaks of mush and none 'bout stars
above.
We've had enough of songs like that, I'm sure you will agree.
So here's the thing were going to sing, it's foolish as can be.
A Chorus girl hates anyone to ask her out to eat
Pardon me...while I laugh
A Scotsman (Dutchman) is the first one who will volunteer to
treat
Pardon me...while I laugh
The chauffeurs and the traffic cops, they get along so fine
And all the chauffeurs think the coppers really are divine
The coppers blow them kisses when they pass before it's time
Pardon us while we laugh.
The alcohol sold nowadays is for external use
Pardon me while I laugh
The fat girls should eat candy, it's the best way to reduce
Pardon me... while I laugh
The first child of a married couple brings them great delight
But when they want to get some sleep, it cries with all it's
might.
The hubby says, "You stay in bed, I'll walk with him all night".
Pardon us while we laugh.

In every song you've ever heard there's been a second verse.
We tried to write one for this song, but it got worse and worse.
We worked on it all summer through, the winter, spring, and fall.
And then we said,  "We will not write a second verse at all."
The nuts you find in Ford cars never occupy a seat
Pardon me...while I laugh
They're putting fans in phone-booths now 
so we won't feel the heat
Pardon me...while I laugh
The Chinese run chop-suey places that are so unique,
And if you want spaghetti, the Italians you should seek.
I never yet have found a restaurant run by a Greek.
Pardon us while we laugh.


Copyright note

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