The Little Old Lady and the Pig

A tale my grandmother would tell me...

Short cut to: pig, dog, stick, fire, water, cow, butcher, rope, rat, cat bottom of page

Read fast...

Once upon a time,
there was a little old lady that lived in a cottage.
One day she was sweeping the floor when she found a dime!
She decided she would go to the market
and buy herself a pig.

On her way home from the market,
the little old lady had to go over a stile to get home.
( stiles are steps that go up and over a fence in a pasture.)

So she said to the pig,
"Pig! Go over the stile
so I can get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the pig said, "I won't do it."
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So, she looked around and she saw a dog,
and she said, "Dog! Bite pig,
pig won't go over the stile
and I won't get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the dog said, "I won't do it."
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So, she looked around and she saw a stick,
and she said, "Stick! Beat dog,
dog won't bite pig,
pig won't go over the stile
and I won't get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the stick said, "I won't do it."
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So, she looked around and she saw some fire,
and she said, "Fire! Burn stick,
stick won't beat dog,
dog won't bite pig,
pig won't go over the stile
and I won't get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the fire said, "I won't do it."
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So, she looked around and she saw a pale of water,
and she said, "Water! Put out fire,
fire won't burn stick,
stick won't beat dog,
dog won't bite pig,
pig won't go over the stile
and I won't get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the water said, "I won't do it."
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So, she looked around and she saw a cow,
and she said, "Cow! Drink water,
water won't put out fire,
fire won't burn stick,
stick won't beat dog,
dog won't bite pig,
pig won't go over the stile
and I won't get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the cow said, "I won't do it."
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So, she looked around and she saw a butcher,
and she said, "Butcher! Kill cow,
cow won't drink water,
water won't put out fire,
fire won't burn stick,
stick won't beat dog,
dog won't bite pig,
pig won't go over the stile
and I won't get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the butcher said, "I won't do it."
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So, she looked around and she saw a rope,
and she said, "Rope! Hang butcher,
butcher won't kill cow,
cow won't drink water,
water won't put out fire,
fire won't burn stick,
stick won't beat dog,
dog won't bite pig,
pig won't go over the stile
and I won't get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the rope said, "I won't do it."
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So, she looked around and she saw a rat,
and she said, "Rat! Gnaw rope,
rope won't hang butcher,
butcher won't kill cow,
cow won't drink water,
water won't put out fire,
fire won't burn stick,
stick won't beat dog,
dog won't bite pig,
pig won't go over the stile
and I won't get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the rat said, "I won't do it."
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So, she looked around and she saw a cat,
and she said, "Cat! Kill rat,
rat won't gnaw rope,
rope won't hang butcher,
butcher won't kill cow,
cow won't drink water,
water won't put out fire,
fire won't burn stick,
stick won't beat dog,
dog won't bite pig,
pig won't go over the stile
and I won't get home in time tonight to bake cookies!"
And the cat said, "I will if you'll give me some milk."
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So, the little old lady ran back to the market
and got some milk.

She came back
and gave the milk to the cat
and waited while the cat drank all of the milk.

And then...

The cat began to kill the rat,
the rat began to gnaw the rope,
the rope began to hang the butcher,
the butcher began to kill the cow,
the cow began to drink the water,
the water began to put out the fire,
the fire began to burn the stick,
the stick began to beat the dog,
the dog began to bite the pig,
the pig went over the stile
and you know what?

She got home in time that night to bake cookies!