Wednesday, July 19, 2000

ok, i know it isn't much, but i have expanded on the story a bit. my ability to write has been hampered over the years and i want for once to write something significant....for me really.

last weekend i weeded throught the boxes my parents brought from home. it's hard to shed those memories...and i thought they would stay with my parents forever. what does a person do with those trophies and plaques from their youth....better yet, how does one just throw out all of this stuff....there are dresses from proms and pageants that i'll never wear again.....tiaras and an old band uniform......so, if anyone wants a piece of memorabilia....mail me. maybe one day i'll be famous and you can donate it to the museum....yeah right.

the problem i have with it all...i don't want to send it to a landfill.....a nice burning would be good, but there are bans on that in town. i imagine i will end up hauling it right back to my parents' home this fall for a good old memory bonfire.

i did keep my letters though.....they serve as notes for my autobiography. part of which i've begun work on here.....it won't be a best seller...or a seller of any sort, but when i'm senile it will help me remember. the past few days i've been rocking out to scorpions in the car....and i feel again those feelings i had in high school...when the only guy i loved raked me through the mud and i allowed it........the next phase begins in college with the discovery of the grateful dead and something much more real.....i gained some dignity and self-confidence in that transition, and looking back i feel indepted to those few that helped me get there: tom wheeler and jeremy babcock being the first, but they come later in the story and i have to admit my discipline is low...so bare with me if you are at all interested....after reading all of these robbins books i feel a bit hyper-critical of every sentence...so it will only slowly unfold....
posted by April Fraze 7/19/2000 09:35:08 AM| link

Monday, July 17, 2000

i've started work on something....i have no idea if it will move past this point, but maybe....
posted by April Fraze 7/17/2000 08:07:21 PM| link

it's difficult to concentrate on work when you know you'll be at a festival in a few days.

i have so needed the atmosphere....the music, the kids, the dogs, the darkness of night, the safety in numbers. no professional attire, no deadlines....no creeping thoughts regarding what i need to get done (i hope). friday i am taking off and driving down to get a good site for camping. i have never seen dark star orchestra or deep banana blackout and it's been too long since i've had a good dose of leftover salmon.....(going wild on the mountain top..yee haw!)

there's something about being in your own element...
posted by April Fraze 7/17/2000 03:14:46 PM| link

just in case quentin drops by....check out his band and their website: bad boogie. i have bootlegs if you're interested.
posted by April Fraze 7/17/2000 03:08:49 PM| link