An Example of How We Impact Other People's Lives Jean Thompson stood in front of her fifth-grade class on the very first day of school in the fall and told the children a lie. Like most teachers, she looked at her pupils and said that she loved them all the same, that she would treat them all alike. And that was impossible because there in front of her, slumped in his seat on the third row, was a boy named Teddy Stoddard. Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed he didn't play well with the other children, that his clothes were unkempt and that he constantly needed a bath. And Teddy was unpleasant. It got to the point during the first few months that she would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then marking the F at the top of the paper biggest of all. Because Teddy was a sullen little boy, no one else seemed to enjoy him, either. At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's records and put Teddy's off until last. When she opened his file, she was in for a surprise. His first-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright, inquisitive child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners...he is a joy to be around." His second-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well-liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle." His third-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy continues to work hard but his mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken. "Teddy's" fourth-grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and sometimes sleeps in class. He is tardy and could become a problem." By now Mrs.Thompson realized the problem but Christmas was coming fast. It was all she could do, with the school play and all, until the day before the holidays began and she was suddenly forced to focus on Teddy Stoddard. Her children brought her presents, all in gay ribbon and bright paper, except for Teddy's, which was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper of a scissored grocery bag. Mrs.Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of cologne. She stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume behind the other wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed behind just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my mom used to." After the children left she cried for at least an hour. On that very day, she quit teaching reading, and writing, and speaking. Instead, she began to teach children. Jean Thompson paid particular attention to one they all called "Teddy". As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. On days there would be an important test, Mrs. Thompson would remember that cologne. By the end of the year he had become one of the smartest children in the class and...well, he had also become the "pet" of the teacher who had once vowed to love all of her children exactly the same. A year later she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that of all the teachers he'd had in elementary school, she was his favorite. Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still his favorite teacher of all time. Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson she was still his favorite teacher. Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still his favorite teacher but that now his name was a little longer. The letter was signed Theodore F. Stoddard, M.D. The story doesn't end there: You see, there was yet another letter that Spring. Teddy said he'd met this girl and was to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering...well, if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit in the pew usually reserved for the mother of the groom. You'll have to decide yourself whether or not she wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. But, I bet on that special day, Jean Thompson smelled just like...well, just like she smelled many years before, on that last day of school, before the Christmas Holiday began. You never can tell what type of impact you may make on another's life by your actions or lack of action. Sometimes just a smile on the street to a passing stranger can make a difference we could never imagine. Would it be nice if we all could have this impact on people? Don't Take The Girl (the song playing, I felt it was fitting to include the lyrics) Don't Take The Girl Johnny's daddy was taking him fishing When he was eight years old A little girl came through the front gate Holding a fishing pole His dad looked down and smiled Said we can't leave her behind Son I know you don't want her to go But someday you'll change your mind And Johnny said Take Jimmy Johnson Take Tommy Thompson Take my best friend Bo Take anybody that you want as Long as she don't go Take any boy in the world Daddy please- don't take the girl Same old boy Same sweet girl Ten years down the road He held her tight and kissed her lips In front of the picture show Stranger came and pulled a gun Grabbed her by the arm Said if you do what I tell you to do There won't be any harm And Johnny said Take my money Take my wallet Take my credit cards Here's the watch that my grandpa gave me Here's the keys to my car Mister give it a whirl But please-don't take the girl Same old boy Same sweet girl Five years down the road There's gonna be a little one And she says it's time to go Docter says the baby's fine But you'll have to leave 'Cause his momma's fading fast And Johnny hit his knees And there he prayed Take the very breath you gave me Take the heart from my chest I'll gladly take her place If you'll let me Make this my last request Take me out of this world God please-don't take the girl Johnny's daddy was taking him fishing When he was eight years old "A Story To Live By" My brother-in-law opened the bottom drawer of my sister's bureau and lifted out a tissue-wrapped package. "This," he said, "is not a slip, this is lingerie." He discarded the tissue and handed me the slip. It was exquisite; silk, handmade and trimmed with a cobweb of lace. The price tag with an astronomical figure on it was still attached. "Jan bought this the first time we went to New York, at least 8 or 9 years ago. She never wore it. She was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is the occasion." He took the slip from me and put it on the bed with the other clothes we were taking to the mortician. His hands lingered on the soft material for a moment, then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me. "Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion." I remembered those words through the funeral and the days that followed when I helped him and my niece attend to all the sad chores that follow an unexpected death. I thought about them on the plane returning to California from the Midwestern town where my sister's family lives. I thought about all the things that she hadn't seen or heard or done. I thought about the things that she had done without realizing that they were special. I'm still thinking about his words, and they've changed my life. I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting on the deck and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I'm spending more time with my family and friends and less time in committee meetings. Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experience to savor, not endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them. I'm not "saving" anything; we use our good china and crystal for every special event-such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, the first camellia blossom. I wear my good blazer to the market if I feel like it. My theory is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for one small bag of groceries without wincing. I'm not saving my good perfume for special parties; clerks in hardware stores and tellers in banks have noses that function as well as my party-going friends. "Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now. I'm not sure what my sister would have done had she known that she wouldn't be here for the tomorrow we all take for granted. It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew that my hours were limited. Angry because I put off seeing good friends whom I was going to get in touch with-someday. Angry because I hadn't written certain letters that I intended to write-one of these days. Angry and sorry that I didn't tell my husband and daughter often enough how much I truly love them. I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, I tell myself that it is special Every day, every minute, every breath truly is...a gift from God. Author? You're having a hard time and lately you don't feel so good. You're getting a bad reputation in your neighborhood. It's alright, it's alright, Sometimes that's what it takes. You're only human, you're allowed to make your share of mistakes. You better believe there will be times in your life. When you'll be feeling like a stumbling fool. So take it from me you'll learn more from your accidents, Than anything that you could ever learn at school Don't forget your second wind. Sooner of later, you'll get your second wind. It's not always easy to be living in this world of pain. You're gonna be crashing into stone walls again and again. It's alright, it's alright, Though you feel your heart break. You're only human, you're gonna have to deal with heartache. Just like a boxer in a title fight, You got to walk in that ring all alone. You're not the only one who's made mistakes, But they're the only thing that you can truly call your own. Don't forget your second wind. Wait in that corner until that breeze blows in. You've been keeping to yourself these days, Cause you're thinking everything's gone wrong. Sometimes you just want to lay down and die, That emotion can be so strong, But hold on, Till that old second wind comes along. You probably don't want to hear advice from someone else. But I wouldn't be telling you if I hadn't been there myself. It's alright, it's alright, Sometimes that's all it takes. We're only human, We're supposed to make mistakes. But I survived all those long lonely days, When it seemed I did not have a friend. Cause all I needed was a little faith, So I could catch my breath, and face the world again. Don't forget your second wind. Sooner or later, you'll feel that momentum kick in. Don't forget your second wind. Sooner or later, you'll feel that momentum kick in.