"We have diaries because we have boyfriends. Not because our boyfriends should read them." Breakup GirlSunday night: He got out of some role-playing game and came over here, because he left all his pillows, etc. in Rumsey. We were fooling around when I get an indignant knock on the door- the bimbos claim I didn't clean the can. Wanna know why? No, but I'll share anyway: because I didn't take their room trash out. What the fuck? And they needed to interrupt a romantic mood, thanks. Then they whined about it the next morning too. UGH. Every 3 weeks around here it really sucks.
Remington and I have gotten even mushier in conversation..."I love you's" all over the place, it's just so cute. It was nice to have him back all to myself again so I didn't have to censor it.
Monday afternoon we had a fun conversation on IRC, when I was griping
about the bimbos and he suggested whacking them with large blunt objects.
I said that then I'd have to go to jail, and I don't think they'd let him
spend the night with me in jail. He said that was called conjugal visits, and I said
that we weren't conjugal, he said that could be easily arranged...we could
get the judge to marry us at my trial =)
Awww. Like I said, when he says sweet stuff like that I get confused.
Anyway, he was leaving work early to go get some more blankets/pillows, invited me to come along. So that's what we did that afternoon...he was asking what kinds of pillows I like (hard, medium, etc), and I said that well, it's your place, you sleep there more than I do, and he said he sleeps there only slightly more than I do. Awww. We were nauseatingly goofy/mushy there, which was fun.
Then we went out for Japanese food (he'd been wanting it, I caved in, so long as he didn't make me eat sushi), which turned out to be better than I expected. Then he had to go back to work for an hour, said he'd return for me then and to go on chat to talk while he was there. =)
However: A while after we'd been online, Zoe came on. And her computer was
having serious problems. And we were trying to figure out some way to
do double postings, or another channel to talk on, etc. for HOURS...it
was so frustrating. "There goes our plans", I thought. Not that I didn't
want to talk to her, but well, then I knew he wouldn't leave talking to
her to go get me.
Zoe and I were doing a separate chat section, she was annoyed at Remington and I was sympathizing. See, there's a
benefit to poly, comparison stuff. She had this idea that (if possible, which it isn't) to log on under each other's names
and see what he'd say to the other person, but I said it wouldn't work. She was trying to ask him "questions of a personal nature", but
due to glitches that wasn't happening too well. Apparently they were also
discussing plans for next weekend...aw damn. Why'd he have to get my hopes up
that he'd do something with me for part of it? I bet he's forgotten by now that
he said that to me (actually, that was what we were bitching about privately, his memory). If he hadn't
said anything, I wouldn't have cared.
Around tenish or so, we finally found our own private chat room, and took it over. Someone on channel bonked her with a spoon, and Remington bonked him with a large blunt object. Hmm, loyal to the both of us, I see. I said it was cute when he got defensive like that.
Later on the bonking guy did the same thing to another guy (reported to be 6'5), and Remington said he could defend himself...it would seem silly for him to try to defend the guy who could easily crush him. I said that we didn't want him crushed, by any means, and then he said "well, then don't ever leave me. that would crush me utterly...:}"
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww..........
I wonder what Zoe thought of that. Well, it applied to both of us, I know, but still.
Kinda weird at the end...when he got off to go pick me up. He told her "kiss kiss.", and later on said to me that he worried that it sounded silly.
We went back to his place, and he went on IRC for a bit, and Melissa (after
finding out I was there- he loves it when I indicate that I'm at his house)
started teasing him that "you're hanging out with a girl you really like, and you go on
IRC. why?" (hmm, Zoe's gripe too.) He said "because", and then clicked off =)
Notes from the most recent Zoe e-mail (my responses sometimes added in in quotes):
In general things went more comfortable than expected...she wondered if it was inappropriate to kiss him in front of me, said that "it makes something tighten inside. Not bad. Just definitely a reaction" to see him and me kiss.
"Well, I was surprised that I wasn't bothered like I thought I'd be...I thought I'd oh, I don't know, lose it or something. that was my fear...well, a twinge is maybe how I'd put it , but not bad. phew. I do feel a little bad doing that in front of you though, well, because of that reason. I didn't want you to feel funny, still don't.'Wished we'd found some better solution for the end of the party- she didn't want me to leave, did want to spend the night with him, and the both of us in one bed was just weird.
"Yes. I hate leaving good parties early on principle anyway, but my spending the night would have been just too odd. Besides, I didn't want to horn in on "your time", so to speak.'I'm sure everyone reading this (all four of you) will think I'm a complete crackpot for putting this stuff in. You're probably right. But you already thought I was insane anyway, so at this point, fuck it.
She gave the spell paper to him to keep safe, and told him to burn it if he gets tired of this arrangement. He said he doesn't want it to end. She said that he should burn it if this ends, and he said he'd want to keep it as a momentum. Then quite a lot about how she thinks the spell's working and how we're all bound together. In writing back I went off a bit on spells I've done myself, but I won't get into it right now.
She was thrown/shocked when I admitted that I love him. That neither of us are likely to end this.
"I can say the same for myself actually...I was well, in denial. deliberate denial... I didn't want to fall for anyone again, I even went off to him about how I didn't want to because then I'd be messed up, etc...not nice, but well, I was scared. It crept up on me."She was talking to him about scheduling things- he doesn't want to and she does- and she isn't willing to only do one day a week. Obviously she can only do weekends, but said it wasn't fair that I never get a date with my boyfriend on weekends. Asked me what I need.
"Yeah. Weekends should be scheduled somehow, at least...When he said that (about one day a week) I didn't think it was fair of him, only one day. Actually I was surprised at that.
Well, I don't know what to say about that, really. I leave some weekends (my parents insist I come home about every 3 weeks or so) so it isn't always a problem, and I tend to see my friends more on weekends (actually, I felt bad for not being with them this one) and homework does need to get done sometime...but yeah, on occasion I have thought that too. but your not getting to see him much isn't fair either. My thinking going into this has in general been that I assume that you guys are doing something on the weekend, I only mention things if he hasn't said you guys are doing something (like the party invite).
Hmm. I don't know, exactly. I mean, most of the time, things have worked out okay, but the occasional weekend (or at least one day out of it) is nice. I have to get up early every weekday, which sucks, and can be kind of a pain to work out with him. Problem is, we do have a limited amout of time to work in (i.e. you've only got weekends, I feel bad "stealing" them or part of them from you)."
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