Susan Terris

WIDOW PRACTICE


Bruised midnight sky.  Sound of winter surf and sting 
of salt.  Sleepless, slurried by undertow she sits, 
aware of voices piping minor-key tunes.

On the beach, debris flares — a pyre as crackle, flame 
and shadow breathe tales, and she, her forehead 
chilled by window glass, stretches one arm 

through the open sash, indifferent as she observes 
weightless shapes intertwine.  Starfish and kelp, 
stripped bare by moon-sucked tide, purple 

and shrink in hollows of raindrop shale.  A rogue 
wave — impartial water-demon — arcing sound
roars, rises, spits, spills, licking at sand

and flame until dogs bay and nothing human moves.  
The tide turns.  Cirrus seines the sky, traps bear 
and whale, traps her, too, until she admits 

why she's here: salt, blood, pulse, wind, dune 
and dune grass.  But no more hot-heart of 
fire.  No bodies coupled on the sand.

PEONIES Alone in the house, she is listening to the sound of petals falling — sometimes one, sometimes as an unseen rush of blood. How better to describe their color? Just blood isn't it exactly, more like venous blood or waning fifth-day menstrual flow or like opened wine — cabernet red-black rather than burgundy and so old it draws toward vinegar. For days, willing the phone to ring, she's stayed at home, eyed ink-shadowed throats, felt hers constrict in response to a capillary intensity of feelings. Call me. Say something. But the call hasn't come, and ripe blood-wine flesh is mottling, slackening, losing depth as beauty fades. Never having been a listener, she hadn't known you could hear petals drop, and though she might see them, she will not turn her head.

WASHRAG Something has happened. Whereas once my speech sluiced like water over a spillway, smooth and satisfying, now it often gaps, lapses, presents moments where — as silence wrings my tongue — no word appears. A few grains of sand scatter through the glass; and words riffle to the surface leaking, overlapping, repeating, dribbling transposed syllables, confused consonants. Oh, please help, my mother-in-law once pleaded. Something is happening to me. But I, still facile then, frowned feigning empathy as I scrawled her signature on the nursing home forms, while she whispered that some person with a washrag was scrubbing her brain away. Now, years later, I feel as if she, arching back, is plying her washrag inside my head.

NO BONES Over a chilly cafe breakfast, my mother told me of the Asian elephant born at the St. Louis Zoo and of a contest to name him which she would miss while spending one-hundred-four days at sea. Between tastes of melon and eggs Benedict, a chink of light warmed my back as Mother, still tracking elephants, spoke of Miss Jim, who — bought with pennies from children — came to the zoo in 1919. I remember, she said, smiling, riding on her every time we went there. While yolks clotted into pocked orange glass, I sat— fork balanced — as if poised to etch memories across the beads of my tumbler. But she was finished. Chink closed. Light gone. I shivered. Like all her images, this one had a soft facade yet no armature, no bones. Then, silent, she lifted her hand, beckoned for coffee, as I recalled a jigsaw we'd once done together with a thousand enigmatic wisps of cloud.

WICCAN SUMMER On a Perseid night in mid-August, spines of liquid silver, ancient dust, a comet trail, air steeped in fumes of white azalea, a rustle of footsteps: vole and fox, rabbit and bobcat. Leaf-wrapped, mud-daubed, our raven hair loose and crackling, we unleash voices into the air. Lend us hot blood. Lend us the sweet-gold of bees and a hint of sting. Lend us rills of darkness and rivers of light. Give us the gift of weightless song. Then we circle a maypole of dew-blossomed vines, dig soles into forest duff, and weave furious spells to staunch the summer's flow.



Susan Terris lives in San Francisco where she is a writer and a teacher of writing. Her recent works include CURVED SPACE (La Jolla Poets Press, 1998), Nell's Quilt (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, 1996) and many journal publications including: The Antioch Review, The Midwest Quarterly, Painted Bride Quarterly, Southern California Anthology, Nimrod, and The Southern Poetry Review. On- line she has had work in: The Blue Penny Quarterly, In Vivo, Switched-on Gutenberg, Kudzu, Gaia, Realpoetik, Ariga:Visions, and Zero City.

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