This here is my own personal test to know if you’re addicted to the internet. Please don’t take this test too seriously. After all, we all need a laugh now and then. Don’t worry, nobody will know about this test except you (unless of course there’s someone there with you). Anyway, let’s not keep you waiting. The instructions are simple. Check the boxes of the phrases that match with what you do. Count the number of checks and match it with the corresponding table below. Well, I guess that’s it. Enjoy!
"Ezwhy’s Internet Addiction Test"

Do you...

    stay on the ‘net past midnight?
    laugh at people with 9600 baud or less modems?
    put the word "com", "org", or "edu" after every period?
    tell people you live at "http://home.street.com/38/simpsons"?
    guess your friends' sex because they have indistinguishably neutral nicknames?
    put smileys and acronyms in your letters?
    give people your e-mail address when they ask for your "address"?
    ask people for their e-mail addresses?
    prefer to be called "surfer" or "net-chick" as a nickname?
    surf the ‘net for no particular reason except to surf?
    exceed your internet account (unlimited account = check the box)?
    check your e-mail even though you just did 5 minutes ago?
    think your computer is too slow for surfing?
    drag the scroll bar on the right just to make text appear on the browser?
    eat meals while surfing the ‘net?
    have totally nothing to do when there’s a blackout?
    see sweat on the seat you’re in right now?
    open 3 or more windows on your browser?
    chat with just about anyone when you don’t find anyone you know?
    have a list of favorite sites as long as grocery list?
    shop on the internet?
    skip meals and gimmicks just to surf?
    flicker your fingers just to simulate keyboard and mouse motions?
    use the ‘net even if you have homework?
    use the ‘net to do your homework?
    e-mail your homework to your friends so they can copy it?
    work on your own webpage?
    have ICQ?
    e-mail yourself since your mailbox is always empty?
    have no love-life at all or have a secret admirer named "hacker" or "cyber-gal"?
    think that they should have internet access in restaurants, hotel rooms, etc.?
    believe that your server is too damn slow for you?
    skip bathing, shaving, brushing your teeth because you’re in a chatroom?
    have bigger eye-bags / more cavities / longer hair now than before?
    e-mail people for no reason but to say "hi"?
    e-mail people who are only a few feet away (office-workers only)?
    watch "The Site" with Soledad O’ Brien or any show like it?
    write down all the URLs (internet addresses) you see in magazines?
    really know what URL, MIRC, ISP, HTML, FTP, HTTP, etc. stand for?
    spend more than 5 minutes answering tests like this?

Review the number of checks above and match it with the table below…
    0 = Definitely not addicted.
    1-5 = Mildly addicted.
    6-10 = Slightly more than Mildly addicted.
    11-15 = Shouldn’t you be doing chores or something?
    16-20 = There’s still chance to rehabilitate addicts like you.
    21-25 = Internet addiction is a vice! Cut! Cut!
    26-30 = Y’know, there more on this planet besides text and graphics.
    31-35 = If the internet was a drug, you’d be stoned senseless!
    36-39 = Repent! Turn away before it’s too late!
    40 = Good Lord!!!
Thank you for answering Ezwhy’s Internet Addiction Test! I hope you’ve enjoyed answering it as much as I’ve enjoyed making it. Please e-mail me at ezwhyseductive.com for any comments and suggestions. E-mail me too of your score if it’s not too much trouble.
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