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TOP TEN THINGS GEORGE WASHINGTON WOULD SAY IF HE WERE ALIVE TODAY By John... TOP TEN THINGS GEORGE WASHINGTON WOULD SAY IF HE WERE ALIVE TODAY 10. "Bob Dole? I ran against him in 1796."9. "I remember when you could get a lapdance for only a nickel." 8. "The metal bird in the sky--why does it serve such lousy food?" 7. "I've got to share a holiday with Lincoln? When the hell did that happen?" 6. "Could we redesign the quarter and lose my double chin, please?" 5. "What's the deal with all these Starbucks Coffee places?" 4. "Hello, Smithsonian? I have a big date Saturday night. Can I get my teeth back?" 3. "I cannot tell a lie. O.J. did it." 2. "How do you think I'd look with a Rachel Cut?" 1. "O blessed Providence, I do love the Baywatch!"
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