Henry:  You can't go like that!  You're naked!
Jack:  We are all naked in the eyes of the Lord.


Jack:  This is the blood of our savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.  And a damned fine
	beaujolais!


Jack:  I don't want him next to me!  He smells like tuna fish!


Dr. Weitzman:  Looks like one of our chairs tried to make a break for it.


Jack: (smugly) I say we skip him and move on to someone of greater consequence.
Dr. Weitzman:  We'll be with you in a minute, Jack.


William:  Why don't you let me outta here so I can *find* a regular girl.  Nurse
	Krummel looks like Luca Brotzie.
Jack:  All God's creatures are beautiful.
William:  Not her.
Jack:  No, not her.


Jack:  Well, my original goal was to rid my agency of Satan's influence, and to
	bring Jesus Christ back into the advertising business where he belongs.


William:  Nobody's ever heard from Albert.  I've had better conversations with
	cheese.


Dr. Weitzman:  There's about 65,000 seats up at that stadium.  But I don't want 
	you to get your hopes up, because they're all screwed down.



William:  Ah, it's great to be young and insane!


Henry:  Dr. Weitzman, I think it's best that I hold the money.  We don't wanna 
	have any sort of wild shopping spree that might embarass the hospital or your
	good name, sir.
Jack:  I drove the money lenders from the temple.  I can handle a ten-spot.


Jack:  I didn't have any buddies when I was on the cross!  I don't need one now!


Henry:  We're directly under the Hudson River now.  
William:  Yeah.  You guys see those tiles up there, all those individual tiles?
	Hey, Doc, isn't it true that if even one of those tiles were to come loose, 
	like millions and millions of gallons of water would come pouring down on us
	and squash us like tiny little bugs?  Is that a leak up there?  See those tiles
	they're leaking, the water right there, oh my God!--
Jack:  I will hold back the waters.


William:  You guys need to pay up and get out of here.
Drunk:  Who the hell are you?
William:  I'm an escaped mental patient with a history of violence.


William:  Restaurant security.  Just a minor utensil violation.  Go ahead, enjoy
	your dinner.


Jack:  Stop!  Who dares to tow the van of the Living Christ?


Hospital visitor:  Dear Lord, we humbly ask your mercy for our dear departed.
Jack:  You got it.


Jack:  I have died and been reborn.  I can do it again, buster!











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