Nick led Angela to one of the empty rooms at the end of the hallway. She was surprised to see one of the new mattresses on the floor and smiled at him, impressed.
"Howie and I laid claim to those right away," he said, winking at her. She couldn't help but notice the personal items strewn across the room, though - clothes, shoes, various hygiene items -- she raised her eyebrows in disbelief.
"I'm a slob," Nick noted, laughing with embarrassment from her disapproval.
Angela fidgeted nervously and swiped her hair. "You know what?" she said suddenly. "I don't have a toothbrush, pajamas, anything here."
Enthusiastically, out of equal nervousness, Nick scurried over to one of the three huge duffel bags lying on the floor and pulled out a handful of toothbrushes, still in plastic packaging.
"Here's a toothbrush." He moved over to another bag and rummaged through it, throwing even more contents to the floor. "And here's a shirt," he added, handing her a large T-shirt.
"Wow!" Angela exclaimed. "What else you got in there?"
"Don't ask," Nick replied, snickering.
The nerves returned and Angela fidgeted again, clutching the shirt and toothbrush tightly. "Well," she sighed. "I'm gonna go get ready for bed, okay?"
"'Kay," said Nick, smiling at her. "I'll be here."
Angela hesitated, then turned to leave. As she walked out the door she could hear Nick let out a heavy sigh.
---------
The bathroom was eerily quiet, leaving Angela uncomfortably alone with her thoughts. Her mind whirled about the entire day's events and what was happening now. Until this moment, she'd just accepted everything casually because everyone else had encouraged it and promoted it, but now that she was on her own, she felt indecision creeping in.
As she turned on the water and dipped her toothbrush under it, she remembered the time her mother had caught her making out with the new neighbor boy. They had been 13 years old at the time. They were instantly attracted to each other and had snuck out to her father's work shed. In the middle of their first passionate experience, the door flew open and there stood her mom, hands on hips, frowning. The boy was sent home and Angela thought she was dead when she was immediately sent to her room. She could remember waiting anxiously for the yelling to commence, knowing that her mother was discussing the incident with her father downstairs. But instead, her mother entered the room quietly and sat beside her on the bed, saying nothing. It ended up being her first, and her only, sex talk.
Her mother had told her about her first feelings of desire and how intense it all was, and of course, all about the boy who had ignited such feelings. Just replaying that memory in her mind warmed Angela's heart and she wished her mom were here now to tell her what to do. Did all the advice at the age of 13 still apply? She was 24 now and a grown woman. Certainly that changed the rules a little bit.
Her mom's voice sounded with clarity in her mind. "Just because you feel all those feelings, Angela, doesn't mean it's necessarily the right time to act on them. There are lots of things to be considered: love, trust, RESPECT." Angela giggled as she felt the guilt all over again. Her mother had looked at her long and hard when she'd said "respect," before continuing her speech. "Respect for yourself and respect FROM him." It was about that point Angela had cried like a baby and her mom had pulled her into a hug, still talking to her. "I made out with a boy and he told the whole school I was easy. Do you want that said about you? Do you know how humiliating that is? Even when it's untrue?" Angela had shaken her head, sobbing, the thought of being called easy at school looming over her.
Still, her mother had continued, with a comment Angela had never expected to hear at 13 years old. "And then there's birth control issues…for….when…it gets….out of hand…"
Angela spit into the sink and popped up to look at herself blankly in the mirror. "Birth control?" she thought to herself. "Holy shit." A cold chill hit Angela. It was as if her mom's past words of caution were sent at this very moment to remind her to be careful. It hadn't even been a thought in her mind until now and she panicked as she pondered how she would bring it up to Nick. Certainly he would be prepared. He probably did this all the time, right?
A knock on the door made Angela jump. "Hey, Angela!" It was Sandra. "Can I come in?" she asked, already opening the door.
As Sandra stood there watching quietly, Angela slipped out of her clothes and put on the T-shirt Nick had given her, pretending to be unaffected by everything. She fumbled underneath the shirt to get her bra off and looked at Sandra expectantly as she pulled it through one of the sleeves. "Did you need something or did you just come in here to gawk at me?"
Sandra hesitated before answering. "I just….I just wanted to make sure you're okay and all that good stuff," she stammered. "I know we've been on you all day about this, but I just wanted you to know that if…"
"Sandra," Angela interrupted. "I'm okay. Really."
Sandra smiled at Angela's reassurance. "I just don't want you to do something now that you'll regret later, you know?"
Sandra rolled her eyes and turned to the bathroom mirror to fluff her hair. "You know me better than that."
Sandra still wasn't convinced, and she put her hand gently on Angela's shoulder. "Yes, I do," she said softly. "But I just wanted to let you know that I do - after all the teasing and stuff."
The moment Sandra had touched her Angela felt her throat tighten with emotion. She put her hand on top of Sandra's and squeezed it. Sandra turned her gently and held out her arms for a hug. Grateful for the offer, Angela squeezed her best friend tightly. "I love you, Angie," Sandra whispered.
"I love you, too," Angela said, squeezing tighter. She did love Sandra, too, probably more than anyone else in the world. She was the rock of sanity in her life and always had been ever since their paths had crossed, switching roles of mother, sister and best friend, when needed.
Sandra pulled away abruptly and completely switched modes. "Okay, with all that said," she giggled. "Here." She held out her hand, offering Angela a box of condoms.
Angela stared in disbelief at the condoms, wondering if they'd been charged to AJ's credit card, and then moved her stare to Sandra.
"Well!" Sandra said defensively. "I couldn't let you go in there unarmed, could I? You don't know where that boy's been, Angela. You have to be careful."
"What do you mean by that?" Angela asked.
"Oh, come on!" Sandra exclaimed. "He's probably got a girl in every state. He's a Backstreet Boy."
Angela winced at her words and the hurt expression on her face made Sandra regret her stupid, unfounded observation about Nick. "Okay, maybe every other state," she added hopefully, trying to play it off as a joke.
Angela took the condoms and studied them thoughtfully, still pondering Sandra's previous statement. She laughed halfheartedly and asked, "But do you think I'm his first Indiana girl?"
Sandra laughed, too, relieved that her friend had found some humor in her words. "Oh yeah, and you'll be his only Indiana girl. After you, they'll all pale in comparison," she said. She then grabbed Angela's hand and pulled her toward the door. "Come on, I'll walk you to your room."
They shuffled out into the hallway and were met by AJ. He looked Angela up and down and grinned as he passed by, not saying anything.
Angela turned to follow him down the hallway with her eyes and caught him looking back at her. "Pervert!" she hissed at him, playfully.
"Why thank you," AJ replied, saluting her. Before he entered into his room, he added, "If you need a back-up, you know where to find me, Ange."
"Gawd!" Angela exclaimed, embarrassed. "Can you believe him?" As they neared her room, AJ popped back out of his door. "And that goes for you, too, Sandra!"
Sandra whispered, "What's scary, is I think he's serious." She nodded toward the door and said "Well… this is it, girl."
Angela paused and hugged Sandra again. "And you make him wear that thing, you hear me?" Sandra whispered, urgently.
"Will you stop with the condoms all ready?" Angela snapped. "You're freaking me out."
Sandra held up her hands in surrender and said, "Okay. Not another word." She waved goodbye and left for her room.
Angela stood outside the door, which had been closed since she left, and deliberated on where to put the condoms. "There is no way I'm walking into that room with a pack of condoms in my hand," she thought. She pulled up her T-shirt and tucked them into her underwear before opening the door to peek in. "Nick?" she called out, deciding against just barging in on him.
"Angela?" he called back, comically.
She laughed and opened the door fully. "I just wanted to make sure you were decent."
Nick glanced at her and said, "Hey, man, you're the one strutting around in your underwear."
"Oh shit!" she blurted. "I left my clothes on the floor in the bathroom."
"Don't worry, I'll get 'em for ya," Nick said, walking toward her. He stopped in front of her and leaned to kiss her forehead softly. "Nice legs."
Angela blushed. "That's what AJ said."
Nick stepped back and folded his arms. "I'll kick AJ's ass for looking at your legs," he joked.
Angela blushed again and stood there quietly, not knowing what to say. Nick smiled at her and walked over to grab a toothbrush, waving it at her as he brushed by her to leave. Angela was surprised he took no clothes with him, but she didn't comment on it. She kind of liked the idea of watching him undress anyway… or did he expect her to undress him? "Gawd," she thought. She'd never undressed a guy before. Would he expect something dramatic? What if he expected… oh God, what if he expected something else she'd never done? What if he expected a… blow job? "Gawd," she said out loud this time. "I ain't givin' anyone a blow job," she argued to herself. "If he wants that he can just call Kim Ann or something." She laughed at her own joke and pulled the condoms out of her panties, contemplating where to hide them. She scanned the room, which was an absolute disaster area by now, and decided on the mattress for quick and easy access.
Angela pulled back the blankets and decided to just crawl in and wait for Nick. The butterflies surged in her stomach again as she laid there studying the condom package. Hurriedly, as if it would all go away if she hid them, she tucked them snugly beneath her side of the mattress.
------
Nick mulled around outside the bathroom, irritated that someone else was inside. Having his own bathroom was one of the few things he liked about hotel rooms - his own bathroom and a good video game. Pure heaven. He sighed loudly, considering knocking, and noticed suddenly that he was holding a pink toothbrush. "Great," he muttered to himself, wondering if Angela had noticed it as he had exited the room. His thoughts of manliness were interrupted when Brian came out of the bathroom.
"Kaos?" Brian asked, surprised. "I thought you'd be in bed by now."
Nick waved the toothbrush at Brian. "Bad breath is NOT romantic, Bri," he replied, searching Brian's face for any sign of disapproval about him and Angela.
"So, I DID teach you something after all these years," Brian replied with no visible opinion either way. He started to leave and Nick grabbed his shoulder just before he was out of reach.
"Brian?" he asked, meekly. "What are you gonna think about all this?"
"What?!?" Brian asked, avoiding the question. "About you brushing your teeth?"
Nick smirked at him and gave him a dead, unamused stare. "You know what I mean, Brian."
Brian entertained the idea of telling Nick exactly what he thought he should do, but decided against it. He knew it should be Nick's decision, not his. "Nick," he started slowly. "You're almost 20 years old. Angela's 24. I think between the two of you, you can figure out what's right and wrong for the both of you. My opinion on the whole thing should have nothing to do with it."
Nick scratched a nonexistent itch on his face and stared at the floor. "I just don't want you to be mad at me, Bri."
Brian sighed, still not wanting to elaborate any further. Reluctantly, he prodded Nick for information. "Are you having doubts, little brother?"
Nick scrunched his nose in thought and wiggled his jaw back and forth. "Mmmmmmm…." He said tilting his head back and forth. "Yes and no."
"Yes?" Brian prodded again.
"Wellllllll," Nick stammered. "I just don't want Angela to think… YOU know."
"No," Brian said shortly. "I don't know."
"Well, YOU know…" Nick repeated, "… that I'm in love or something like that."
"Uh, you haven't given her any reason to think that, have you?" Brian asked, concerned for Angela's feelings.
"Noooooo! Noooooo!" Nick replied, laughing. "Not at all. I just… well… you know how girls are," he added.
"Yeah," Brian answered dryly. "You sleep with 'em and they think it actually means something."
Nick winced a little at the harshness of Brian's words. "Yeah," he agreed guiltily.
Brian knew right then that Nick was just dying for him to tell him what to do. As always, he wanted someone else to make a decision for him rather than think it through for himself. Brian just couldn't do it. He wanted to, for Angela's sake, but he couldn't. It was time for Nick to grow up. "All I can tell you, Nick, is you've got two choices. You can go into that room down the hall and be Nick Carter, Backstreet Boy, or, you can be Nick Carter, the guy that Angela sees you as being."
Nick was staring intently at Brian's face, hanging on his every word. "Now," he continued. "Both guys are highly capable of the same decision, but…" Brian paused for impact. "One guy will end up being hated and one guy will end up being liked, when it's all said and done."
Nick's hand was clasped around the toothbrush like Dumbo with the magic feather as he considered Brian's words of wisdom. "You're right," he agreed, still not sure of what to do. He did like the idea that both guys were capable of the same decision. At least Brian hadn't told him outright that he shouldn't do anything.
Brian squinted and looked at the toothbrush in Nick's hand. "Pink?" he asked, smiling.
Nick shrugged, embarrassed. "I was trying to get in touch with my feminine side tonight."
"Yeah, I can tell,” Brian retorted. "You're feeling anything BUT feminine tonight," he added, punching Nick lightly in the shoulder. "Go brush your teeth, Nicky. I'm goin' to bed."
Brian started down the hallway and turned to walk backward. "Good luck!"
"Yeah… good luck," Nick said weakly to himself as he waved goodbye with
the toothbrush.
Links to other sites on the Web
To Chapter 42
Back to CONTENTS
© 1997 crunkgrl62382@yahoo.com
Get your own Free Home Page