"I'll just have a coke." I told the waitress at The Hard Rock Cafe. Freddie gave me a scornful look.
"Is that all you want, sweet?" Seth asked.
"Yeah." I nodded. I rested my chin on my hand and looked around at the decorations on the walls.
"Well, tomorrow's the last day of shooting." Freddie announced.
"Are you two excited?" Seth asked.
"Oh yeah." Freddie said. "Aren't you, Carlon?" I didn't answer. I heard him. I just didn't speak. "Carly?" He said again.
"Yeah." I finally came to.
"Too bad we have to wait three more months before the premiere party." Freddie leaned back in his seat. I turned my head again. There was a couple sitting next to us. They were young. About my age. The guy reached across the table and grabbed his girlfriend’s hand. I slowly turned away. It wasn't fair. I pushing myself over the edge. I had complete control, but I couldn't take advantage of it.
"Freddie, do you mind if I go use your car phone?" I asked.
"No, go ahead." Freddie tossed me the keys to his black Lexus.
"I'll be back." I stood to my feet and pushed my chair under. I made the long journey through the parking lot trying to find where valet parked the car. Finally, I found it. I unlocked the door and climbed in. Now...who was I going to call? I knew I had to do something, I just didn't know what. Then, I figured it out. I picked up the phone and dialed the number.
"Hello." The voice on the other end cheerfully answered.
"Brian?"
"Carlon." Brian said in excitement. "How are you, babe?"
"Great." Brian didn't say anything. "Crappy." I told him the truth.
"That's what I thought." He mumbled. "I haven't seen you in a while."
"Yeah, I know. That's why I called. I needed someone to talk to."
"You know I'm always here." Brian informed me. "So, what is it, Carly?"
"Brian...I love AJ."
"I know." He said.
"So, why did I screw it up?" I asked.
"Hell, girl...beats me." He laughed. I smiled through the phone. There was never a time he couldn't make me laugh.
"At least I know that I screwed up, right?"
"It's not that you know you screwed up, it's that you attempt to fix it." Brian said.
"So...how do I do that?" I asked propping my leg between the steering wheel and the door.
"You just gotta be real." He said.
"Gotta be real?" I raised an eyebrow. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"I don't know. I was hoping you'd figure it out." Brian didn't say anything for a moment. "It means...you...you have to do what comes naturally. 'Cause, everything that happens is meant to happen. So, if you screw up, you were meant to screw up. There was a reason for it. If you do the right thing, it was meant to happen, also. So...pretty much everything you do is right. It was already going to happen anyway. You have to go where your heart is, girl."
"Yeah, so, I'll just pretend like I got all of that, Brian." I said.
"Just don't let him get away, Carly." Brian said. "I can guarantee you that this one is perfect for you. I might not have been so sure in the beginning, but I know now. Trust me."
"Thanks." I smiled.
"I love ya, kid. If you ever need to talk I'm here, but I gotta jump in the shower."
"You do that, B." I said. "Take care." We both said goodbye before hanging up. "Do what comes naturally." I said to myself. "What is that?" I asked. Being depressed was natural. So, what did Brian mean? Pondering on it too long was going to give me a headache.
"Good to have you back." Seth smiled as I took my seat back at the table. I handed Freddie his keys. Freddie looked at me questioningly.
"Brian." I told him. Freddie smiled. "Seth, I was thinking. Maybe I could act in Florida. You know? I mean, there is a lot of acting going on there. Who says I have to stay in L.A. to act?"
"No one says that, sweetie." Seth swallowed a few french fries.
"I just think that...I think that's where my heart is." I told him.
" You know Seth here has all the connections. You could be a successfull actress in Cuba." Freddie said.
"If Florida is where you want to be, then be there, doll. I don't want you to be unhappy."
"Who says I'm unhappy?" I asked. I unfolded
my napkin and placed it
in my lap. I then picked up the menu and searched it
over for
something good to eat. I couldn't let this get me
down any longer.
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