YET MORE PHREAKS
AND/OR STUPID IDIOTS!

Power poaching
A poacher electrocuting fish on a lake in central poland fell into the water and suffered the same fate as his quarry, police in wloclawek told reporters. The 24-year old man was one of four who went fishing with a high-voiltage line attached to a net, designed to stun and capture the fish. “For a while everything went according to the poachers’ plan, and they had fish in their bags. But suddenly, one man holding the net tripped and fell in the water,” the agency said. The other fisherman tried in vain to revive him, it said.

Man gets five minutes probation
HARRISBURG, Pa. - A man who beat up a guy he caught in bed with his girlfriend was sentenced to five minutes probation by a judge who suggested the victim had it coming. "I'm not saying I condone violent behavior," Common Pleas Judge Scott Evans said. But he added: "if I go to some other guy's house and sleep with his significant other I don't know what people expect." Michael Fulkroad, 31, punched Greg Allen Cook in the mouth, threw him against a wall and chased him out of the house Fulkroad shared-with Cathy Ford. Cook needed 32 stitches. Fulkroad pleaded guilty to assault and served his sentence Wednesday. Prosecutor Edward Marsico Jr. complained-that the five-minute probation "made it seem like it was all the victim's fault." DUH!

Officer in convenience store makes hold-up inconvenient
HOLLYWOOD, Fla. - Eveijo Alberto Palau had robbed stores at gunpoint plenty of times in his criminal career. But he'd never done it with a police officer in the store. On Thursday night, Palau pointed a gun at a clerk in a Hollywood convenience store and told her to empty the cash register. Standing near a cooler in the rear of the store was Wilbur Fernander - a Hollywood cop. Apparently, Palau didn't notice Fernander, or the large, bright yellow letters on his black T-shirt that read HOLLYWOOD POLICE. "When he finally looked at me, his eyes got really big," Fernander said. "He just froze." And he didn't get away. Palau, 29, of Miami, walked into the Circle K store shortly before 9 p.m. Thursday, police said. Fernander - a street crimes officer - was inside the store conducting a routine business check. His partner, officer Susan Hayes, was waiting outside in an unmarked police car. As Fernander was walking toward the back of the store, he heard a man's voice: "Give me the money. Give me the money." When he turned around, he saw Palau holding the gun on a clerk. "He pointed the .357 at his face," Fernander said. Fernander called his partner over the radio. Then, he walked up behind Palau and ordered him to drop the gun. "He had the gun in his right hand," Fernander said. "I just go him off guard." Palau dropped the loaded pistol on the counter, raised his hands and surrendered. He was charged with armed robbery and possession of a fire arm by a violent career criminal.

Father brings lawn mower into house, charged
BELTON, Mo. - A boy who wanted to sleep rather than mow the lawn received a rude awakening when his father started up the mower in his bedroom. Rickey Worthley woke up his son Michael at 6 a.m. Saturday to mow the lawn, but the 17-year-old told him to go away, saying it was way too early. His father returned, this time with the mower. He pushed it through the door and started it up, cutting clumps from the bedroom carpet, said police Sgt. Randy Scott. Michael threw a fan at the mower and his father left. The boy called police, who arrested Worthley and charged him with assault. No one was injured.

Man, 50, loses left hand while making a pipe bomb
TUCSON, Ariz. - The left hand of a 50-year-old man was blown off while he was making a pipe bomb, authorities said. Mickel James Marsden was using a trailer in his yard to make pipe bombs when the explosion occurred. "Neighbors told us that Marsden had been setting off explosives in his front yard before," said Lt. Ron Benson of the Pima County Sheriff's Department. Bomb technicians later removed a large amount of extremely volatile explosives from the man's home and detonated them in a landfill Saturday. The explosion at Marsden's home was called in to 911 by a neighbor who then hung up to take him to a hospital. Marsden underwent surgery and was listed in fair condition Sunday, a nursing supervisor said.

University student settles suit over butt-swatting incident
FULLERTON, Calif. - A student who accused a university professor of swatting him on the bare buttocks instead of flunking him settled his lawsuit against the school and professor for $35,000, a newspaper reported Saturday. Keary Johns, 25, will receive $10,000 from Julian Foster, 69, a professor emeritus at California State University, Fullerton, the Los Angeles Times reported, citing sources close to the case. In addition, Johns will be paid $25,000 by the university, said Colleen Bentley- Adler, spokeswoman for the CSU system, which is based in Long Beach. Johns' Orange County Superior Court lawsuit had sought $1 million over the incident, which he claimed was racially motivated. Johns is black; Foster is white. The lawsuit said the political science professor gave Johns a choice in April 1994. Drop the class as an incomplete or take six swats on the bare buttocks from a thick ruler.

Woman arrested with toddler in bag
OGDENSBURG, N.Y. - A woman was arrested after she was caught carrying her toddler in a zipped duffel bag, police said. Ruth Scott, 21, was shopping in a convenience store on Tuesday when she stuffed her 2˝-year-old son in a 30-inch long nylon bag and zipped it up. The attendant at the shop saw her and called police. When confronted, Scott admitted the child was in the bag hanging from her shoulder. 'We opened the bag and saw that the child was laying there with a smile on his face, his arms wrapped around a half-gallon of milk," police Officer Robert J. Grady said. Scott was charged with a misdemeanor count of endangering the welfare of the child. She pleaded innocent in a court appearance on Thursday. She is due back in court.

Burger chain halts gun ammo coupons
BALTIMORE - Lawyer Susan Wolf couldn't believe what she found on the back of her Burger King receipt a coupon that said, "Good for one free box of ammo with gun purchase or 10 percent off." "I was appalled," said Wolf, who found the ad from a Catonsville sporting goods shop while eating lunch. After hearing about the advertisements on Friday, the restaurant chain's corporate headquarters told the owner of the Baltimore franchise to hold the coupons. It's not the image that Burger King would like to be associated with in any way," said corporate spokeswoman Kim Miller, who noted that the chain sponsors a national alternative school for "at risk" teens - "oftentimes the very kids who end up using handguns." "Somebody at Burger King must have lost their mind," said Officer Gary McLhinney, president of the Baltimore police union. Tim Watson, who owns the S&W sports shop advertised on the receipt, said he didn't know what all the fuss was about. "I don't sell to lowlifes or the criminal element," Watson said.
"The criminal element is getting guns illegally."

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