(Meg comes out & attacks Patsy...security guards pull them apart.)
Crowd: (Chants) Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!
Meg: You better leave my man alone, tramp!
Patsy: I don't want your man.
Noel: Then why are you calling me, huh? ...Then why are you calling me?
Liam: See, mate...not only is he ruining the band by being so bossy, he's ruining my life. It's not enough for him to take over the band, he has to take my wife.
Noel: I didn't take your wife. She's the one flirting with me.
Patsy: Oh, whatever. Whatever!
Jerry Springer: Now Patsy, you admitted to calling Noel.
Patsy: Yeah, I admit to calling him, but so what? What's a phone call?
Meg: Look, you've got your own man so you better stop messing with mine.
Patsy: I ain't messing with your man.
Meg: Yeah, okay...whatever. That's why you're calling our house every night.
Patsy: If I wanted to cheat on Liam I certainly wouldn't cheat on him with Noel, unless I was drunk.
Meg: Are you dissin' my man? Are you talkin' about my man?
Patsy: I'm just saying that I can do a lot better than Noel.
Jerry Springer: Well, Patsy ...we've got a guy here who claims he was dating you while Liam was on tour.
Patsy: What?
Liam: Who is it? Who's been messin' with Patsy?
Patsy: Nobody. I'd never cheat on you Liam, not with anyone.
Jerry Springer: Well, that's not what your mailman says.
Liam: Newman!
Patsy: I didn't cheat on you with the stinkin' mailman.
Jerry Springer: Let's bring him out...here's Liam & Patsy's mailman, Newman.