The Jokes Page

On this page you'll find crap jokes, blonde jokes and tasteless/dirty jokes that either i've found off the internet or that i've been told. If you're easily offended leave now.

THE CRAP JOKES

Here's a rubbish joke for you:
how many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
-only one, but the lightbulb has to want to change.

what do you call a crazed stoat in Manchester?
-mad ferrit!

what's brown and sticky?
-a stick!

THE BLONDE JOKES

If you're either blonde, have no sense of humour or are easily offended, please don't read this bit:

why did the blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
-so she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.

what did the blonde's left knee say to her right?
-nothing, they've never met

how do you know that a blonde's been in your fridge?
-there's lipstick on the cucumber

how do you know when a blonde has been using your computer?
-there's tippex on the screen.

how do you kill a blonde?
-put nails on her shoulder pads.

what does a blonde put behind her ears to make herself more attractive?
-her legs.

THE TASTELESS/DIRTY JOKES


what's the difference between snot and brussel sprouts?
-kids will eat snot.

whats this? (bite your palms)
-jesus biting his nails.

why do gay couples take on foster children?
-because they enjoy rearing them.

what do you get if you cross a rabbit with a lawnmower?
-minced rabbit.

what do you do if you come across an angry ape in the jungle?
-say sorry and wipe it off.

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