2

"My buddy." Was all that Hellerman said.

"Is he dead?" asked BJ

"Yeah."

"Do you mind telling us how he died?"

"Uh, well ya see..." Hellerman stuttered nervously. All of a sudden he just collapsed. He covered his face with his good arm and his body heaved with loud, hard sobs. "I killed him. I killed him! I killed Paul. I didn't mean to, it was dark and I couldn't tell. I heard the twig snap and I just shot. I heard him fall. He was just six or seven feet away from me. I heard him breathing, so I fired again. He never cried out. He was being the good solider. Not giving away his company. I killed Paul. Its all my fault. Patrol found him the next day. They thought a sniper had gotten him. I didn't say anything. I just ran away. I got fired at and managed to find my way here. I can't believe I did that. I killed Paul!"

"Look pal, its gonna be okay" BJ assured him.

"No, its not. Its not gonna be okay. Paul wasn't just a war buddy. He's been my buddy since we was kids. When we heard the war was on we decided to fight and we enlisted together. We promised our Ma's we'd look out for each other. I killed him! When we was in boot camp, he made me promise if he died I'd take care of his Ma and his sister. How am I ever gonna be able to face them. I killed him!"

Hawkeye slowly reached over to pull the bottle away from Hellerman. As soon as Hellerman realized what he was doing, he held the bottle to his chest and feverishly shook his head.

"Doc, you can't take the drink away from me. Its all I gots to help forget it. I'm not going back. The MP's are probably already coming for me. I'm just gonna run away. I'll live in Japan. My family will think I'm dead. I'd be better off dead. I should be dead. I don't have the right to live."

"Son," BJ said, "Think about your Mother. Think about Paul's Mother. What are they going to do without their boys to take care of them. You have to take responsibility for what you did. You have to take care of Paul's family for him. They'll forgive you in time. It was only a mistake. You didn't mean to do it. You are not a bad person, and if you're not alive, then a lot of people are going to be sad."

"No. I can't. I'm sorry. I know that's what I'm supposed to do but, I just can't. I'm real sorry."

Hawkeye laid his hand on the boys shoulder and said, "What kind of a man would desert his family?"

"Me. That's who would. I'm no good for no one."

"Hellerman, I don't like to do this, but until you sober up and think about this, you're not going anywhere. You're in no condition to make decisions right now. Now if you'd just relax, we can talk about it tomorrow and we'll figure it out. And uh, that's an order. That's how you give an order, right?"

BJ shrugged his shoulders, and they both turned to hear Hellermans response. Hellerman stared at them.

"Sure," he said. "You need until tomorrow to get the MP's up here. I know what you're planning. You're gonna turn me in." Hawk and BJ stared at each other and almost started to laugh.

"Kid, if anyone is gonna tell the MP's on you, its not us. Believe you me, if we called the MP's, they'd arrest us before they arrested you." Hellerman looked at them both.

"Well, all right." He said. "But you're being honest, aren't you?"

"Of course. And serious too. Both of those happening on rare occasions only." Hawkeye said.

Feeling contented, Sergeant Hellerman allowed the two surgeons to take him back to post-op. After giving quick instructions to the nurse on duty to keep an eye out for him, they returned to the swamp for a night with no sleep.

Early the next morning BJ and Hawk walked wearily into Post-op, still wearing their bathrobes. Greeting Sergeant Hellerman with pasted on smiles, he returned the look.

"We came to help you write a letter." BJ said.

"I don't need to write any letters." Hellerman replied

"Yes, you do. One to Paul's Mother and one to your Mother." Hawkeye responded

"Oh no. No. I told you last night. I'm not going back."

"It doesn't matter weather or not you go back, but you owe an explanation to them. We also brought you a present. What better to use when writing a letter then a new pair of glasses." Hawkeye said, as he pulled a pair of glasses out of his bathrobe pocket.

"No way. That's for wimps."

"And what are you, super man? You'd think after a mistake like you make last week you'd want glasses!" BJ retorted.

"Fine. Fine. Just gimmie them." Grabbing the glasses he put them on. With his good arm he picked up the pencil provided and started to write. After a few minutes he threw down the paper and pencil and angrily glared at the doctors. "There. There is your letter. Just send it to Mrs. Emily Baxton, 87 Helens Lane, Portland Oregon."

Taking a quick note of the address on a spare sheet of paper, BJ and Hawkeye left to go mail it, while Hellerman started on the letter to his Mother.

They unfolded the letter and BJ read it out loud, "Dear Mrs. Baxton. I am sorry to say that Paul died on the 22 of May. He was a good soldier and died saving his unit. Don't be sad, because he helped a lot of people. I am also sad to admit, that his death was my fault. Please do not be angry, because I am very sorry. I cannot believe I did what I did. If it is okay with you, I had made a promise to Paul to take care of you and his family, and if you are not too angry with my, I feel now more then ever that I have to do what he wishes. As soon as I am sent home, I will make sure that you are never sad again, because I know what this must being doing to you. I am so sorry for what I did, I am sorry for the pain I caused you and I hope you can forgive me. Sincerely, Adam Hellerman."

BJ slowly refolded the letter and placed it in an envelope. They placed it in outgoing mail and hastily returned to Post-op. Hellerman had finished his second letter, but requested that he be able to mail this one, because he didn't want anyone to read it. Respecting his wishes, they brought him and envelope and even helped him walk over to the mail bag so that he could assure no one would read it. After replacing him in post-op, BJ and Hawkeye walked out and just stood, staring at the mountains. They were startled by the sound of a jeep approaching. It stopped in front of Colonel Potters office and two MP's jumped out. After a few minutes, Potter returned with the MP's at his side.

"There here are the surgeons who operated on him. Do either of you two recall what happened to Sergeant Hellerman?"

Nervously they stared at each other and then Hawkeye spoke up. "Um, he went to Tokyo. Was sent to the evac hospital last week. I haven't seen him since." The MP's rushed back to their jeep and headed off towards Tokyo. BJ and Hawkeye turned to Colonel Potter.

"Sir," BJ said, "We need your permission for a hardship discharge."

"Oh really, who's it for and why?"

"Well ya see," Hawkeye said, "It's for Sergeant Hellerman. He's very deeply depressed. He needs to get home right away."

"Wait a second, what are you boys trying to pull. Wasn't Hellerman the guy you just told those MP's was sent to Tokyo?"

"Um, yes well you see sir, he was but through a traumatic string of events, he is afraid of uh, um.." Hawkeye trailed off.

"Bus stairs." BJ quickly filled in.

"Yes exactly. And of course that's the only way to get him to Tokyo, so we were just wondering if with all the problems he was having back home, as well as his buddy just dying, we could get him sent home a little early." Hawkeye stuttered.

"This sounds mighty fishy to me boys, but what the heck. I don't think I wanna know the whole story anyway, but if you boys are completely serious about this, you go right ahead. I owe you a favor anyway. Just talk to Radar. And keep this under wraps!"

"Yes sir, thank you very much Colonel." Hawkeye said gleefully. They rushed into Radar's office, shoved a hardship discharge into his hands, gave him the needed information and told him to get it ready right now. Then they ran over to post-op to give the great news to Sergeant Hellerman. Knowing the MP's were going to be coming back as soon as they found out Hellerman never got there, they radioed for a chopper to come pick him up right away. It'd take him to Kimpo, from Kimpo a plane to Hawaii, from Hawaii a boat to San Francisco and from there a train to Portland, Oregon. Just as they predicted, just a half an hour after Hellerman left, the MP's showed up. They searched the whole place and found no record of Hellerman having been there for the last week. Joyous over their triumph, Hawkeye and BJ returned to the swamp for the only night of sleep they'd had in three days.