Week Ten
Ask Hook-Nose
Advice-Giver Extrordinaire
*Question*
Dear Hook-nose,
I have a problem with my boyfriend. We'll call him..."Lark".
Now, my B.F, Lark, is well...a little dorky. I really like him but, he's
just...not stupid, but... i don't know...DUCKY.
Yep, that's it...he's
ducky, and I just don't know what to do about it.
Can you help me?
Signed,
"Corbeau"
*Answer*
Dear "Corbeau"
Ducky huh? I've seen cases like this...the boyfriend seems a little thick in the cranial cavity at times? Here's the scoop on what your boyfriend has. Duckanosis is a serious affliction that many of today's youth face. It has been linked to cases to DBS(Dumb Boy Syndrome) and Permagrin. Duckanosis is charaterized by it's tendancy to it's host bite those they love and blurt out saying such as "Look at me!?" while waving their arms around in the air like wings. They also love to collect marbles and work with trees and shrubs, especially in the distruction of these plants.
So now here comes the difficult part. As far as our modern science has proven, there is no known cure for Duckanosis. There is only the prescription of a diet of mostly meat, very little veggies, lots of nesting(beds work well and cuddling is included in this activity), late nights at Perkins, some kind of chew toy such as a bit(the oral fixation level is raised in Duckanosis hosts) and putting the lime in the coconut and calling the doctor when you wake up.
~:>
"Watch for Duckanosis, it's a growing epidemic!"
H-N
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