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Nov. 27 1998

The Danish Dilemma

Question:

hi, I am a girl from Denmark.One of my friends has been trying to commit suiside several times. Her best friend has given up about her because she could not take any more. she hates her parents and her parents hates her. she lives on the street and she is doing drugs. I am not talking so much with her anymore, but I really do want to help her. I hope that you can help me.

The Truth As I See It!
I hope I can be of some help, too!
The best thing you can do for your friend is be there for her. Granted it will not be easy for you. Your friend will pull at you emotionally in every way and some of her pain is bound to seep into you. That is just the way it is for people for are suicidal. The fact that you have stuck by her so far shows a great level of friendship and caring on your behalf. It may come to a point where you can longer stand it. You may become drained of everything you have to offer and you'll have to sever the friendship for your own well being. Another sad fact of life.
I will not pretend to know all that is going on in your friends mind. A quick observation, though, would be that she is seeking attention, the attention and love that should be a given from her parents but is sadly missing. She needs help and you and anyone that cares for her may not be enough! The little I do know about Denmark is that, seeing as it is a socialist society, there will be help out there for your friend as well as you. There will come a time when you personally can do no more for her and you will need to seek out professional help. She is in dire need of counselling and you can help her to receive it. Worse comes to worse, you may have to assist in forced assistance. There will be foundations available for you to contact that can help you while helping your friend. Check the phone book or search the net for a phone number near you under "suicide prevention". There are many web pages available dedicated to just that. Do some research. If a period of forced confinement and treatment is the only way to save your friend, then it will be worth it and in the long run in her best interest!
So make some calls, talk to some professionals, you can't do it alone, and be prepared to be there for her in every way.
I wish you all the best!

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